Ex and Now, what to do???

[notsogood123]

So, here’s the deal... I've only seriously dated one girl my whole life, (23yrs old now). Dated 5 girls not so serious, when I was younger and 2 since we broke up.

 

We dated for about 1.5 years, short for most people, but that’s my longest. Things went south in the fall after she turned 21, that whole 21 stage. I hit it too.

 

The Breakup:

Happened right after the holiday season, we were fighting a lot. 2 weeks after we broke up, she had a new guy, I suspect it may have started the weekend before we broke up. Which I constitute as cheating. When we broke up it was sort of mutual, but in hindsight I realize that she had been picking fights with me.

 

4mo later:

 

She started texting and calling me, once to go to the bar, another to "talk", and another to come to a party... probably 6 attempts to hang out in about 3-4 months after we broke up. I blew her off, part of me wonders if she was trying to get back together then.

 

Last summer:

 

We hung out a few times, nothing sexual, just friend’s type deal, and at the time I had no emotions towards her.

 

Now:

 

Went to a chill bar with her the other day, got a few drinks and got to talking. Found out that the guy she broke up with me for had cheated on her about 5 times. She also informed me that his myspace has a tracker that makes it so he can see who has viewed it, this is big because I looked at his profile before they started seeing each other, which means he knew about me, even though she claims he didn't. Makes me wonder if something was going on prior to when I thought it was. We got to talking and she brought up her numbers were still low, but I told her I didn't want to hear about it, that’s when that ended. I think she was trying to initiate some kind of conversation about what I've been up to in the dating world, or something of that nature, it went along with the context of the conversation. She has talked about hers some, but I've really left mine kind a vague, she does think that I’ve dated probably 4 maybe 5 people since her. I know she’s been with at least 3 people since we were together.

 

So, we went out to the bar, with the exception of those few choice moments it was a good time. and she’s going to come and help me shop for stuff in my apt next week.

 

So here is the dilemma:

 

I would ask her out, or make a pass at her, call it what you want, if we didn't have such a rotten history, or at least if we had broken up on fair terms and she didn't jump into bed with someone before, or right after we broke up.

 

The other problem is that I really have never been serious with anyone else, by no fault of my own, I've tried to date other girls seriously. They just don't take interest in me. If I had dated other people as she has, I think I would feel differently about how things are now. But, I have nothing to compare her to, so how am I to know if she’s really that good or really that bad.

 

This is the most messed up thing I’ve ever said but, "I don't know what I want or how to feel about this" such an un-masculine thing to say.

 

What would you do in this situation?, or maybe how do you feel about this situation.

 

 

(my previous relationship, before her ended with my girlfriend cheating on me, and breaking up with me in the exact manner as this one, she knew how much i had trust issues from that)

[ghost69]

she is your ex. she talks with you about her other exs all the time. i'd cut all ties with this girl and date another. you need more experience and definitely more time away from her.