What do you think makes a successful marriage/partnership?

[everythingchanges456]

I'm curious to have some real life opinions from people who are successfully in long term relationships....what do you honestly think is the key to a successful marriage? Should it be a great friendship...does it matter if it's passionate? How important is sex? I'm curious to know peoples opinions...tested opinions on this one.

[Karainbow]

I think the most important things are trust, wanting the same things, the right timing, that special spark of passion and i think for most people sex is important, but not the be all end all.

[melrich]

what do you honestly think is the key to a successful marriage?

 

I think that you have the same or very similar personal values.

 

Should it be a great friendship...does it matter if it's passionate

 

Yes I think friendship is very important. Ideally the passion would be there but many very successful relationships get to a more "comfortable" level.

 

How important is sex?

 

It's important though I would talk about it more as intimacy than sex. It's important to have intimacy as part of your relationship and that includes sex. Otherwise what you have is a good friendship.

[RebeccaChow]

Well, have been in a 3 years relationship. Took ALOT of patience, commitment, understanding, compromising, giving in, good communication etc. Its more about this than sex or love. Sex is of course a vital part of the relationship, but no relationship can do without trust. Once the trust is broken, nothing can heal the relationship. I always believe in that, I will break up with my boyfriend if he breaks my trust, no matter how much I love him.

 

So it takes 2 hands to clap, everything else needs effort. That'll lead to a honest and lasting relationship.

 

x

[TheFoglifter]

Money, sex, and family are the 3 biggest relationship killers. Two people could be perfectly compatible, and deeply in love, but have an unsuccessful relationship based on problems with one of those three.

 

Be on the same wavelength about money, sex, and family, and you are set.

[zerohalo]

I agree with the money, sex, family thing. My ex and I fought often about her handling the money badly and me burying my head in the sand about it. She often made me feel bad for my rather unusual tastes in sex, and neither one of us could see having children together.

 

Trust is vitally important. I trusted my ex implicitly, and she used that for 2 years to sleep around behind my back. When she finally told me what she had done, that was the final straw that broke our limping camel's back. There was no coming back from that one. I'm kinda glad she did it though, in a really weird way. The relationship was dying for a while.

 

Acceptance is damn important to me. It isn't enough that you love someone, they have to completely accept who you are and love you based on your strengths AND faults. You will not be changing your SO, so don't bother sticking with them if that's your plan.

 

Religion is important. If you two don't believe some of the same things spiritually, I can definitely see some issues down the line. Especially when raising children.

 

And also, being able to see yourself with the person in the future. Can you see raising kids together? Buying a house? Getting older?

[Mrs Elliott Smith]

1. Respect

 

2. Similar values about lifestyle, family, etc.

 

3. Two people who are open and willing to work on the relationship in order to maintain the positive and dispel the negative aspects

 

4. Knowing to "choose your battles" wisely

 

5. Similar interests. This one may sound superficial, but, believe me, I know a few people who are unhappy in their marriages simply because they have very little in common (interests-wise)

 

6. Trust

 

There's a whole slew of things ..... too many to list here.