me3almost4

my oldest is 9,my husband is not the biological father but has been with us since my oldest son since age 2 and is now his parental guardian..my other 2 girls are 5 and 2..my family know what is happening,apart from the odd phone call or text they have not really been much help im afraid. i keep thinking "it will be so hard on my own" but then i think well its not like he did anything to help me anyway. the worst thing is the torture i put myself through like constantly thinking is he with her now,what are they doing.if he could just be honest with me and tell the whole truth then i think i would know where im at.but as slmitchell said,its not like he is going to dig himself in deeper and say oh yeah i have been sleepin with her. just so confused,dont jknow what to do for best,well i do know but do i have the strength to do it.

we only got married last year as we were financially able to afford it then...i suppose i have always been the onewho does everything..it seems to have changed and became more selfish since he got his new job last august..he works away between 1 and 5 days a week,so because he has this oh big responsible job,he seems to think he needs to do anything.i tell him i need help and will keep saying this until we end up argueing,he will then help out for a day or 2 then it will go back to normal.i have tried telling him not only am i pregnant have 3 children a house to look after and go to work,but because my work is in an office he thinks i just sit on my backside allday..i know he is still lying to me about what has happened and he thinks because he admotted kissing this girl that i should be like"oh thats fine then".he is a selfish git and the kids are so used to him not being here that they just dont want to bother with him either.he is 31 so it isent like he is still young..i know the best thing is probably not to be together but like i said i am scared of being alone,i dont have a close knit family and my mum is very ill herself.it makes me so mad to think that its ok for the father to leave and do what he wants but the mother is always stuck with all the responsibilities.its not like i can say to him "well im off now,you look after the kids and i will go and enjoy my life",not that i would anyway as they are my life.its just so unfair

hi i am in similar situation to you..i am 37 weeks preg with 4th child and have just gone on maternity leave (i am in england)my husband works away alot so when he is here i expect him to help me with the house and children and for us to have some time 2gether.but no he would rather go out with his friends drinking and he expects me to do everything in the house,and with the children.he is 31 yrs old and acts about 18.anyway i told him i had enough and he repaid me by going and cheating on me with some girl,this was last fri.he is not living here at the moment and i really dont no what to do.i can not forgive him and although he says he is sorry and wants us to sort this out i am not conveinced as this girl texted me saying she had known him a while . really need some advice.

i thought i needed to come on here and let out some of my frustration. i am currently 25 yrs and 37 weeks pregnant with my 4 th child.i have been having a pretty hard time,my husband works away and when he is home he never helps me.i have been quite down as i felt like a single parent who had all the responsibilities and he didnt have to worry about anything...anyway i got to the point of being so angry and frustrated that i told him if he didnt clean up his act then i wanted him to go as he seems to treat the place like a hotel. so this was about 2 weeks ago, since then we had decided he would find somewhere to live but was still staying here,last fri he went out(he usually goes out every weekend)didnt get back till 6 in the morning. my daughter brought in his phone as he had left it in the bathroom.i decided to look through to see what was going on and if his mates were influancing him in some way...anyway there i found in his out box about 15 texts to this number constantly askin if they could meet up or if he could go round there...then the fnal text said "do you love me".i was so shocked,i texted this number and asked who they were and did they realise that he had a wife and nearly 4 kids...she texts me back saying they had met each other as friends and that she did fancy him,she said he had told her about me and kids and that we were not getting on,and then she tells me she has only seen him a few times but that she does love him. well...i am soooo angry,march up to him and ask him what the f**k is going on,he tottally denies anything even though this girl is still texting me,tellin me how great he is.i tell him to get out now,he spends the next day swearing to me that he did nothing.i tell him to go to hell.he then admits he kissed her but that was it,i no he is lying,with all those texts and everything,i no it was more than that.anyway he has been phoning and texting all week beggin me to be with him,but he came round yesterday to see kids he was ignorant and a total * * *,i was asking him questions about what happened and he totally blanked me. it seems he can say all these nice things in the texts but not to me. i just dont no what to do.baby is due in 3 weeks,we have only beenmarried since last july,but together for 6 yrs. its like he wants a single life but with all the home comforts.i am so afraid of being on my own and being lonely..but i can not forgive him for what he has done,especially when i still think there is more to it than he is letting on... anyone have any advice please ????