Atlas72

Don't take this the wrong way, but the idea that men don't feel or have as deep emotions as women is ridiculous. Women can be every bit as cold, manipulative, deceptive, mean and emotionally detached as any man. Trust me on that. I have always thought that women seem to feel as if they can do no wrong, it is always those awful terrible men who cause pain. Well, as the line goes in As Good As It Gets, women seem to be men minus the components of reason and accountability. Why is it that women are given a pass when they rip men's hearts out, but if a guy breaks up with a woman or lies/acts cold he is evil?! One might say it is a case of tasting ones' own medicine. Point is, men and women can be mean and cold. If anyone is silly enough to believe that women are kind and emotional and sensitive while men don't have these traits, then they shouldn't be posting or even dating for that matter.

In the past, there have been at least a few attractive women who found me attractive and dated me. I was dating the same girl for the past 3 1/2 years but we broke up a few months ago. I was pretty confident that I could find the woman I wanted (finally). I am in my mid 30s now, I am in good shape physically, I have a decent job, I am socially adept (I can talk with women fine and make them laugh etc.), told I am decent looking but even had a nose job last year because I was self conscious about my shnoze. I am not meeting any women at all. No friends of friends, no work connections (which I don't want to do anyway for obvious reasons), I can't stand the bar scene and anyway at this point I am almost the old guy at the bar. Even link removed which worked for me in the past hasn't gotten any hits, and that is what really gets me. When you aren't meeting anyone, you are making the effort to get out there and meet people, and no one seems to show any interest, where do you go from there? And how about the slow ego/pride leak that occurs when even link removed users aren't paying any attention to you? Depressing, makes me want to give up.

So I met this girl from link removed a couple of months ago and the first night we hung out we had (I thought anyway) a good time. I thought she was attractive, and she seemed to feel the same way about me. At the end of the night I kissed her, not makeout kissing but a nice "let's do this again I like you" kiss goodnight. We hung out a couple more times (mainly to watch our favorite sports team) but she seemed to get increasingly indifferent/aloof towards me. One time she also called her friend and asked her to meet us out which she did. I guess that was the "test with the friends" routine, maybe I got a thumb's down. At the end of the third "date" I went to kiss her and she kinda withdrew, so I guess I was spiked at that point. Anyway at the time basically I told her best of luck in your search since she wasn't into me. But she has called/e-mailed me from time to time for random stuff. Last week we went to see a game together, had a really good time. And she proceeded to tell me about how she was into a couple of guys she met recently and how she was trying to get them to reciprocate etc. Which brings me to my question. My attitude is, even if a woman isn't into you after you go on a couple of dates, it makes no sense to blow her off. You might be able to meet some of her friends, you might have a good time just going out with this person etc. But at the same time I felt a little weird when she was telling me about these guys she was sweating, as she knows I dug her and probably still do. Isn't that a bit wrong to be telling someone who likes you about how she wants these other guys and advice about what to do? Am I a complete loser for hanging out with this girl who rejected me a couple months ago? It's not like I'm paying for her when we do things, just a cute girl to go out with. I'm not hanging out with her with the intent to hook up, although if it were to happen that's OK. And why would she keep contacting me after I said "ok well if you aren't interested good luck take care?" Would you say "hey you don't want me, bu bye" or do you think it's wise to remain friendly with people you don't hit it off with?