shadow20

oh trust me ive told her how i feel, many times, weve been fighting for a long time now because shes just always unhappy, saying her life sucks etc, (everything except me of course . she probably is resenting me for trying to solve her problems, but if shes not happy, im not happy, its that woman thing you know lol., i jsut want her to be happy, but im at a point i dont feel i can do anyhting else, shes just always unhappy... driving me mad, but i dont want to leave her... i do love her, which is why im still around... weve been together almost 2 years now

My girlfriend is having a heck of a time trying to manage her life right now. Things are not so great between us because of it, she cant manage her workload, she cant manage her emotions, shes kind of a wreck right now but wont acknowledge she needs help. Ive been to councelling before and it changed my life, i think if she did the same it could really help her, how can i get her to realize its ok that shes having trouble and she needs to get help. She keeps saying that other people deal with more problems she shuold be able to deal with this, but the fact is she cant, shes getting closer and closer to right out depression, and well im not being the best bf because its been like this sooooo long, im exhausted of trying to deal with it i really love her how can i get her help!!!!!!!!!!!!!! thanks

Well just thought id update, i got over that short term dilema about the other girl and am focusing back on my relationship, but its back to the same old problems lol.... does anyone suggest going to relationship councelling? even though we are not married, etc... i think it might help...

Id say im still in love but not like i used to be, i care about her a lot, but i think i have lost a some and am going on the comfort and habit thing. I really dont know what id do without her around, most of my weekends are spent with her and her family. Ive had a lot of girlfriends, a handful of very serious ones... my relationship before this was about a year and a half, and ended badly, It seems in my life experience though, every relationship ive left... i ended up getting with a girl that is even better, and has always made me happier lol... my own experience is kinda my downfall perhaps, maybe im being too greety, and this will turn out to be the best its going to get so i need to just focus on this relationship, i dont know. in the past 2 years, what i want in a girl has changed quite a bit (going from 17-19 is a age of big change in my opinion) so i feel kind of bad for her, because im basically an adult now, im quit mature and ... well serious in my career goals, and ive begun expecting things from her she just might not be capable of. or doesnt want to do now because she is still young. shes 18, about a year and a half younger than me, but i meant she lives at home, ive been out on my own for 2 years now. To RayKay I dont hate the way she breathes lol, but some of the stuff is kind of serious, we try to communicate but often end up fighting about these types of things. one example is her attitude towards life, she is really negative, and often jokes about ending her life (i know she wouldnt but it still bugs me beacuse ive been around people like that) she also doesnt seem to have any ambitions in life, doesnt really want to do anything where as im the complete opposite with all my goals laid out, that also bothers me because im nieve about other ppl maybe and feel she should be able to do the same. We have some trouble communicating even though it would help, i am some what short tempered on certain issues. and she is very stubburn and difficult in general to talk with. some people from school used to joke that we arent compatible because we are so much alike, im starting to wonder if that is true , and im starting to wonder if i really am settling just because im settled... i really dont know, i somethings (NOT ALWAYS) get a feeling i could od better, i dont know why but i do think that sometimes I am also REALLY busy right now with school and interviews and stuff, so im finding it hard to kinda sit down and think hard about what i want to do? and shes been not happy with me (in the way she talks to me) since i brought up this whole situation, and i dont blame her for that, but its not helping. Thanks for the help guys/girls , i appreciate any more info you guys can put in. Sorry this is so long!

I love and hate that saying at the same time: Ive always struggled with this, i know i have, ive identified it in me in the past. I dont think im really all that good at resisting it though. Its hard not to think of what could be with this other girl that seems "great". True i could be choosing to lose interest but how do i begin to regain interest in her? it seems there aer more things that bother me about her, than things i like about her lately. Also her mother is a Nazi (hope i can say that) shes really controling of her and almost in a way is helping to make our lives miserable. thanks for the reply though. i like grass too much

other posibilities. I feel like an *** for writing this but i need some advise, no guarantee i will take it but id like some anyway. First, as my topic says, i have been with my girlfriend for 1 year and almost 10 months. We are really close, and i am really close with her family (second home) and ive met most of her distant relatives a few times too. It had always been my plan to marry her, things seemed perfect... up till i started doubting stuff a few months ago... now those thoughts have been rotting my brain and are getting worse. I find myself not as interested in things with her, she has some issues i thought she would of grown out of by now and havnt and they are becoming a big deterant to staying with her. I really dont "want" to leave her, because generally we get along pretty well, but things are far from perfect. Second part of this is that i have begun thinking of other ladies as posibilities, now i know from past relationships how bad this is... because this is usually when things go really sour and just end. Now there is a couple other girls but there is one in particular that i cant get my mind off. its kinda lame so bare with me here. I havent talked to her for a couple years but we went on a few dates back then but things just never went further because i was still getting over a past girlfriend. but this girl seems perfect for me has some of the same hobbies, is upbeat/positive, shes in university, im sure she has some things that i wont like, but all girls do. Anyway i lost my train of thought cause i got a few phone calls. Any ideas what i should be doing about this, any good advice would be wonderful. thanks. .........s.h.a.d.o.w..........