lily676

i can relate to what you are going through, i don't have any answers because i am still in the middle of everything myself ... i do know it will help to move out of the house where you lived together. nothing is worse than being surrounded by constant reminders of your life together if you are not together. good luck.

iceman, thanks for replying. the fights were about everything by the way we lived together, money,food, random things that really got stupid because they were so inconsequential. I think the root of some of the conflict is his being stressed out at work he has a lot of deadlines and me having been quite irritable and depressed but not treated for it (now that has changed). we were taking things out equally and stupidly on eachother.

My boyfriend and I of 2 1/2 years are supposedly broken up, but sometimes it doesn't seem that way. I made the mistake of continuing to contact him after we came to this decision which we came to after a few months of constant conflict and bickering-- although underneath it there was always a level of mutual respect and love- in other words it never got abusive or nasty, just tense. I feel that continuing to contact him put me in a position that I don't want to be in and let him know exactly how much I regretted the decision and still want to be with him. Now he is saying he isn't ready for any committed relationship and being very distant and short with me when we do talk on the phone which is a big change from our previous talk of getting married, having kids, buying a house (we are both in our late 20's). At the same time now and again he just pops in and we still have dinner do our laundry together grocery shop together etc. and he is coming to thanksgiving with me to my family's. I miss him desperately and my heart is broken, but I have within the last few days decided that I am not going to contact him first anymore; but i feel so confused because of all the things we are still doing together. I don't know if I should keep my distance and figure he just needs space to see that we really should be together, or if it is better for me to just move on, because this in between stuff could just go on forever, and I will still be investing all of this energy into something and someone that will not work out. Or do I keep contacting him anyway, since he obviously still wants something to do with me. I don't know what to do, or if we are even broken up? Any advice is welcome.