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Thread: need roomate advice

  1. #1
    Join Date
    Nov 2002

    need roomate advice

    my roomate and i have been sharing an apartment for the last year. we usually live together quite well but lately she's been slacking on her responsibilites. i have become frustrated about the situation as we have had problems in the past and just when i think we're on the same page she starts to slack again. i do not enjoy asking her to do things around the place and need advice on how i can finally get her to be aware of her responsibilities and to remember when she needs to do her share. in the past she had told me to simply tell her when things need to get done, as she says her memory lapses about stuff like that, then when i do follow her request and remind her of what she needs to do, we end up having a terrible spat because she thinks i'm picking on her. i feel i'm in a bind, as she's not only my roomate but one of my closest friends. i am coming to the conclusion that i cannot change her absentmindedness and that i should move instead, as i cannot deal with the continual stress anymore. but before i make that drastic a decision, i was hoping someone would have some other advice? thanks!

  2. #2
    Join Date
    Jan 2003
    NV, USA
    If roommate (or BF or GF) situations aren't working: Move on. Their abuse isn't part of the rent check you write every month. Their inability, or unwillingless to fulfill their responsibilities or tasks doesn't automatically become part of your responsibilities or tasks. If you can't have a friendship with your roomie, they aren't being good roomies, nor good friends. Move on it if you have to. Express your extreme discomfort with the situation; make them aware you have intent of moving out if they don't ship up. If they still do it, go find yourself another place, and part ways. Don't let someone else ruin your life for you (we all know how many opportunities we have for ourself to do this! ). Most importantly, don't be afraid to move out. There are plenty other roomies available (not necessary all good ones, mind you) and certainly plenty other apartments (or whatever you are seeking). Draw a line for yourself, and if they break it, take action.

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