BoddenProBowler06 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 I just got a new girlfriend and we were both friends for the longest time. We would talk on the phone every now and then but usually not. Now that we're in a relationship, we try to call each other everyday but there is always awkward silences. We talk about how our days went, school, etc., but the convos end pretty quick and then I run out of things to say. Eventually I just make an excuse to get off because I don't like just wasting my time when no one is talking. Any tips? What do YOU people talk about on the phone with your significant other? Link to comment
Stu147 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 I just got a new girlfriend and we were both friends for the longest time. We would talk on the phone every now and then but usually not. Now that we're in a relationship, we try to call each other everyday but there is always awkward silences. We talk about how our days went, school, etc., but the convos end pretty quick and then I run out of things to say. Eventually I just make an excuse to get off because I don't like just wasting my time when no one is talking. Any tips? What do YOU people talk about on the phone with your significant other? I think you have identified the problem in what you wrote. You talk every day! Some people are happy just engaging in small talk, but some people aren't. And then come the akward silences. I would strongly suggest cutting back to calling each other every couple of days, or few days, and just texting here and there in between. That way there are a couple of days in between for interesting things to happen that you can talk about. It's rare that something interesting happens every day of the week, and once you've gotten to know everything about someone then you can run out of topics pretty fast. Once the conversation becomes forced then it's pretty much redundant. Hope this helps. Link to comment
Lana0120 Posted November 20, 2007 Share Posted November 20, 2007 I've never subscribed to the theory that you have to talk for hours and hours on the phone in a relationship. You're putting pressure on yourself to talk, which is part of the problem. Don't worry about it so much. If you can't think of anything to talk about, it's okay to hang up after making suitable excuses! Link to comment
Mysterious Gurl Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 Hey! I use to have the same problem, even on MSN there would be gaps in the convo but obviously on MSN you're not "umming and arring". We use to speak on the phone everyday too because we missed talking to each other. However I found just ringing every other day helped and talking on MSN more than the phone helped too. MGx Link to comment
Clementine orange Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 Women talk, men listen. In my experience. I'm one of those many guys who hates telephone "conversations". Link to comment
Zackinlaw Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 My new girlfriend and I talk about anything and everything on the phone. We talk about our day ... things that excite us, things that disappoint us. We also talk about random stuff ... sometimes deep, often silly. There is really no limit to the range of things we talk about because we find everything about the other fascinating in some way. The funny thing is ... she never really liked to talk long on the phone before with anyone ... but you'd never know it from the 4 or 5 hour conversations about absolutely everything and nothing that we have insanely into the wee hours of the morning. I guess what I'm saying is that if you are really into each other and in love, and are truly compatible, you will find things to talk about ... or maybe just enjoy hearing each other's voices. Zack. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 When my boyfriend and I first started dating, we'd play the question game. It was great because it let us get to know each other in a new way (we had been friends for over 3 years before we started dating) and because we were long distance and wanted to talk on the phone everyday. So you just take turns asking questions, but you have to answer the question that you ask. They can be silly, thoughtful, deep...anything you want. It's just a fun way to get the conversation going. Link to comment
JimmerJammer Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 I suppose it depends on a bunch of things as I, being the goofball that I am, can get a little discrete on the phone as I do it to be funny. Like start moaning on the phone so my gf is like what ARE you doing? I mean I know as adults we gotta be mature and serious, but jeez life is too short to be a prude all the time. I can be serious and I realize she might not think its funny, but if all I did was be boring and predictable all that would do is make the relationship comfortable and routine. Is that really enjoyable or what we do based on expectations of who we SHOULD be? And ya if I'm not talking about everyday stuff I usually try to find something else of relevance like if there was something troubling me or if I noticed something that urked me which I wanted to talk about with her. Like global issues or local ones or just even remembering abstract memories of things which I don't expect her to get or understand but I say them anyways. Sometimes there are moments of complete silence where neither of us says anything and it feels forced to make conversation and other times its like it takes no effort. Sometimes I'll tell stories or make references to something I read as a moment of wisdom or inspiration. Sometimes its just like I love you, no I love you, no IIII love you, etc. lol And other times I can just sit there watching something or playing a video game and just making random comments about how the game is pissing me off or how much butt I'm kicking in it. Lame? Maybe, but hey even if she laughs at me at least we're bonding. I might even give her some insight into how my character has formed over the years and what brought me to the place I am. Explaining how it is I run through my life on a daily basis and the things I want to someday achieve. So ya hopefully that gives you some idea of the things to talk about over the phone. Cheers Link to comment
Killasasparilla Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 I've found that when talking goes dull, texting is a great alternative. Link to comment
someguy88 Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 When my boyfriend and I first started dating, we'd play the question game. It was great because it let us get to know each other in a new way (we had been friends for over 3 years before we started dating) and because we were long distance and wanted to talk on the phone everyday. So you just take turns asking questions, but you have to answer the question that you ask. They can be silly, thoughtful, deep...anything you want. It's just a fun way to get the conversation going. I love the random questions game! It is a fun way to get the conversation going. I've learned more about my friends and SO's playing the questions game than I can even begin to explain. Link to comment
Daligal83 Posted November 21, 2007 Share Posted November 21, 2007 It is a lot of fun, I play it with friends too. My best friend is amazing at coming up with questions. Other ideas that we did...one is to have a date night over the phone. Like if you both have a favorite TV show or rent the same movie, watch it at the same time. It's "almost" like being with them. It's as close as you can get for the time being. Another thing I did was to ask my boyfriend what was the most interesting thing he learned that day. We were both in school at the time, so we could both answer. It was interesting to know what your SO is learning about and what peaks their interest. Link to comment
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