samross Posted March 3, 2007 Share Posted March 3, 2007 I thought things were going in the right direction for me and my 'ex' but last night showed me painfully that we're not. Our mom's weren't there so she didn't have to put on an act. I turns out that my best friend and her seem to now have a thing going. Last night at the club I tried as hard as I could to act like I didn't care but it is just too much. I think she said two words to me all night. While I was sitting by myself miserable her and my 'best friend' were really hitting it off. She was constantly leaning over close to him and saying something in his ear and then the two would have a great time laughing. I have been a fool to think that there was chance. What I can't understand is as miserable as I was why she can't even just say are you ok? (I know, stupid question). It seemed like I could have died on the spot and it wouldn't have mattered to her. The drummer came over and said 'you doin ok?' and I smiled and said I'm trying. I told him he was the only one that ever reaches out to me and he said he has noticed that and he's really starting to get ticked with my ex and my 'best friend'. I know they are free to do whatever they want and I have no say in it but I'm ready to get off the rollercoaster from hell. We have one more gig to do tonight (our moms will be there tonight so she'll probably avoid my friend unlike last night and be on her best behaviour - surprise surprise). Link to comment
BeStrongBeHappy Posted March 3, 2007 Share Posted March 3, 2007 i am so sorry... a breakup is a bit of a rollercoaster ride, and sometimes it takes a while and a few ups and downs before you can really see what is going on... actually very rude of her and your friend to flirt so openly in front of you, but it may be their way of letting you know what is really going on (i.e., they are getting ready to go more public with their situation). people are sometimes cowards and don't want to have the talk to break the bad news to you, so they just show you what is up and let you deal with it yourself. very cruel, considering both were supposed to be close to you. but anyway, you need better friends than them, so please try to exit this situation as best you can so that you are not continually hurt and can heal yourself. If they were decent people, they would have given you a heads up so that it was less of a shock to you. Link to comment
drum4god Posted March 3, 2007 Share Posted March 3, 2007 Dude, don't get down on yourself. I don't think there is a man alive who wouldn't have felt hopeful after the way your ex was acting towards you not too long ago. Dude, I am not going to lie, this is not going to be easy. If I were you I would consider leaving the band. At least take a sabatical. Your well being should take priority right now, and if seeing the women you love hang over a band member is going to torture your soul you need to leave. I truly feel for you bro. I go through the same thing seeing my ex in church every Sunday, and she isn't even with someone else. I can't imagine how I would feel if she was. You will get through this, but you have to be honest with yourself. If you can't handle seeing her with someone else, you need to leave the scene. Link to comment
Wandering_Sword Posted March 3, 2007 Share Posted March 3, 2007 Don't beat yourself over it. The ex and your "best friend" are two fools. Pulling a stunt like that in public and not noticing what they are doing to you (these people who are supposed to be close to you after all) is just plain moronic. And on top of that a person (the drummer, an outsider) noticing this over them just proves that these two need to be ex-communicated ASAP! Dip these two in honey and dunk them head first in a large (very large) mound of fire ants! After this ordeal, do you honestly want her back!?! This is not the same girl that you fell in love with... I won't even bother cursing your so called "best friend," except to say "Casino Royale, James Bond torture scene" ... Link to comment
disgruntledbaker Posted March 4, 2007 Share Posted March 4, 2007 time to find a new best friend. theres no situation imaginable that would make it "ok" to pick up a friend's rebounding ex. thats completely bogus. seriously, over time if a relationship formed once the extreme emotions have cleared and you've truly made your peace with her then you couldn't really fault him, but this early it's criminal. if he were my friend he'd get a terrible beat down. and as for the ex... she's prone to making foolish choices now, but i find it curious that she should choose your "best friend" to make those foolish choices with. wandering sword is right, would the girl you fell for do this? she's gone. she may come back some day, possibly better than ever, but right now this person is a horrible and hurtful person that you shouldn't want in your life in any way. ditch them both, and if they're any sort of decent people they'll find their own ways back into your life. leave the band. Link to comment
papalazarou Posted March 5, 2007 Share Posted March 5, 2007 Blimey just goes to show you dont know people. Your best mate is an arsehole quite frankly and yes leave the band for the moment. Disappear and find a new best friend AND stay away from "her". Dont feel bad about misreading any "signs". We all do it im afraid when we are hoping for reconciliation! Link to comment
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