Could she be interested?

[Galleon]

First some background information:

 

I'm 25 years old and currently going to college for my Associate's and certification for networking.

 

I have never dated before in my life and my self esteem is very low.

 

High school was a very horrible experience in my life. A day would not go by where I was not picked on or made fun of. And basically I had no one to turn to for support, I had very little friends and could not count on my parents. This is what contributed to my self esteem issues.

 

I do realize that high school is nothing compared to the real world but there is still this lingering feeling that I can't shake. As if everything will fall apart again if I make a fool out of myself.

 

 

Now fast forward to the present. This is my 2nd term and I've gotten pretty comfortable with all the people in my major. There's this feeling of comraderie amongst us, we actually help each other with study groups and such. Trying to make sure that we all graduate together. Which helped my self esteem a bit so I basically didn't care if I had a girlfriend or not.

 

At the beginning of the semester while waiting for class to start I notice this girl accross the hall eyeing me. I brushed it off as just looking since people glanced around all the time.

 

More days pass and everytime I am waiting for class to start I notice her staring at me each time. Again, I'm in denial and I brushed it off. I didn't actually suspect that she was interested until I was in a lab one day and she walked by the room, she was staring at me the entire time while walking by the window.

 

So one day I decided to test her attraction by making eye contact in return. She didn't stop looking and it was very hard for me to maintain it since she was making me so nervous. It felt like an eternity. I tried to smile but it was such a shaky smile that she probably didn't even notice. This lasted about 10 seconds or so.

 

I also noticed that she was kinda mimicing my stance. I was standing with my arms behind my back and she was doing the same, except sitting down. Which must've been kinda uncomfortable for her.

 

Because of this long stare, I decided to make the first move and introduce myself the next time I see her. I arrive early as usual to my class and waited but she didn't show up until about 5 minutes before my class started so I ended up going inside.

 

I was still determined to talk to her so I decided to at least say hi to her after class. I sat down at the table in the hall and started doing some of my homework. She still stayed behind in her class for about 10 minutes or so and when she came out I got up and approached her. You have to understand that this was a VERY BIG BREAKTHROUGH for me. I have never done this before and was so scared.

 

I just told her that I wanted to introduce myself and asked her a few questions, like what was her major and if this was her first term. She replied with one word answers and didn't ask anything in return.

 

I looked for body language signals. She was smiling the entire time but..... she looked like she had an embarrassed smile. She was laughing a little bit, but because of the embarrassment again, I did not say any jokes or try to be funny. I was pretty awkward, I smiled, but I think she sensed me being nervous and lacking confidence. She was probably laughing because there was this idiot making a feeble attempt at hitting on her.

 

Anyway, because I was sensing the embarrassment. I got the impression that she wanted me to leave her alone. So I tried to give her an escape route by asking her if I was making her late for something. She said she did and had to leave and I apologized for holding her up. I said it was nice meeting her and let it go from there.

 

The only reason I approached because she was constantly looking at me. I guess it meant nothing. But I'm still unsure about her embarrassment. Could she have been embarrassed because the guy she was interested in was talking to her? Or because the idiot was hitting on her? Did I also come off as a creepy guy by waiting after class? Is she just shy? Should I even attempt to talk to her again?

 

I'm thinking maybe she was just shy since she doesn't really talk to anyone else in the hallway waiting for class to start, except for one older woman who seems to be outgoing.

 

I'm starting to regret approaching her since she's gonna see me everytime before that class starts and think that the creepy guy is there again.

 

Sorry for making this so long.

[Cadence308]

It's really hard to tell if she's interested in you. Sometimes we see things because we want certain situations to happen and other times we are just plain blind and do not see anything.

 

I don't think that you should be embarrassed at all about approaching her. This was a big step for you and you should chalk it up to that. You actually got up the guts to approach someone and introduce yourself.

 

It sounds like you see her often and now you know her name. Next time you see her, smile and say hi, how are your classes going? Maybe do this as you walk by or as she walks by you and see what happens. See if she stops to talk to you or if she pretends she doesn't hear you, etc. Over time, if she's stopping to talk to you then that may mean she's interested and you can ask her out.

 

GL!

[Dating Coach]

Hey, I want to give you HUGE PROPS for approaching this girl! WAY TO GO BRO!!!

 

About her glances/stares/body language... I don't want you to get ahead of yourself. I want you to understand that any of those things you described could mean ANYTHING. From what happened she could have been thinking anything from, "My God he's gorgeous!" to "What is that freak looking at!" This is why I don't pay too much attention to these things. Well... I pay attention to them, but I do not allow them to get me to think, "Hey, this means she might like me!" because it doesn't mean that most likely.

 

What I do use those things for, is to gauge a situation and see if I get any "turn off" signals rather than "turned on". If I see a "turned off" signal such as a dirty look, or a bad attitude, or a wedding ring, etc I dismiss the person as not worth the time. That's it. Any other signs that aren't noticibly negative, I wouldn't let it change my thoughts whatsoever.

My actions will then depend upon what I want to do, not what I think she wants me to do. If I want to approach her, I do it. I don't need signal permission from her. This is the better way to do it.

 

For more information read the first two links in my sig.

[ghost69]

who cares what she thinks of you now. you put yourself out there. you did what 45% of people on this site complain about. not trying or why they didn't or how can they.

[ghost69]

give her the open chest punch like on ScaryMovie. if she doesn't get mad that is a good sign. lol, jk.

 

yeah, let her attempt at you. don't be pushy.