RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 Okay, i've been really good friends with this one guy for a few months now. It was one of those 'he started out liking me, then we became friends when i didn't like him in return' deals. I do a few school activites with him, including track, but hes also big into music and its his passion, as well as sports. He's very shy until you get to know him, but i can tell him all of my problems no matter what it is, he'll listen and give advice. I talk to him online tons and we know eachother very well, and I've begun to hang out with his friends lately, 2 time sin the past two weeks, but he stated that he never organizes plans, he goes where hes asked. He's never dated a girl before i don't think, unless it wasn't serious but i haven't really asked, because of how he doesn't really talk to others that he doesn't know. BUT, here's the thing, i've liked him all along but i would never be able to tell him, though we have the really strong base friendship to build a relationship over. Theres two problems though. There's three of us who like him. One of the girls who likes him is obsessive over him. She liked him before i did and has been chasing him for months constantly telling him that she loves him and asking if he would date her. He says no repeatedly, but feels bad about it, so he'll hang out with her when she asks him to, which sometimes puts him in akward situations that give him grief. I often tell him he shouldn't hang out with her, because it will confuse her into thinking that he likes her by doing stuff with her, but he feel sit wouldn't be right and shes contantly yelling at him for random things, but he has no interest in her, she just causes heaps of problems. The second girl does track too, and shes in a musical activity with him. Shes really flirty and shes gone out with tons of guys and she was flrity enough to get him out of his shell for a while and see the real him inside, so obviously she liked him after that because he's just so perfect. She talked to him online a lot, always initiating conversation with him, so he starts to like her to because she expresses an open interest with him. He liked her to the extent that he even got up the courage to ask her out, and then she declined, telling that she did it because she thinks that i like him, but i don't know if she told him that. She shouldn't be a problem, but lately shes been really trying to hang out with him a lot and iming him and telling him all her problems and i think shes starting to regret declining him. I could never let him go out with her, because shes really not a great person and she kind of.. has been around and is known to cheat and be unloyal. I'm not sure if he know this yet about her, or if he'll say yes to her because he's had a thing for her.. but i don't know, because hes a thinker. And then there's me. The friend who really is in love with him, but wouldn't be alble to tell him ever because she is too shy. I really need help on what to do. Also; he's having a football game tomorrow and has been telling all his friends about it. Girl number 2 IMed me saying that she wanted me to go too, because she didn't want to be the only girl there,s o i agreed but i can't play football and would hate to be embarrassed in front of him and see her showoff in front of everyone. I really need help. I don't even know what to do I just know I feel stuck and I feel like something isn't right. can one of you guys help me out? Link to comment
Locke2121 Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 If you don't snatch the brass ring first, someone else will....sounds to me like he may be holding out for someone special...might be you! It won't kill you to at least ask...keep us updated. 1 Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Author Share Posted February 24, 2007 i feel like i couldn't risk losing our friendship over it though Link to comment
cantexplain Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 Okay, i've been really good friends with this one guy for a few months now. It was one of those 'he started out liking me, then we became friends when i didn't like him in return' deals. Since you asked, I'd say make a plan to get together with him - and go ahead and take the risk that as your friendship has grown you do feel like he is the type of person you'd like to date. Sure its a risk ... but if you don't make this move one of those other gals will. Funny, now that I think about it the same thing was told to me by my highschool sweetheart (I was interested in her and her only through 7th and 8th grades. I got to be her friend while she was dating upperclassmen!! - ugh) Anyways, one night during a dance she took me accross the street from school and just kissed me!! It took a few more months but we were then committed to one another for another 7 years. So, another thing, you could just kiss him and see what happens!! Love can be risky to the ego - rejection is always on the table. In fact, the possibility of rejection probably keeps us more passionate about our love interests!! 1 Link to comment
cantexplain Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 i feel like i couldn't risk losing our friendship over it though ahh, if you are really his friend and he is a good guy this won't risk his friendship with you - we already know how he used to feel - probably still does. I think you got a good chance here. Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Author Share Posted February 24, 2007 vdhsdgfjkshgj i hope so it feel so hard though, ised to be able to really talk to him but now its like i feel tongue-tied. this is stinkyyyyyy : / Link to comment
cantexplain Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 hehe I know that feeling!! so I see, you do like him, 'eh? Lucky guy!! Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Author Share Posted February 24, 2007 haha i reallly reallly do.. andlike, im not sure if your familiar with aim, but when someone puts something you say in a conversation that they find funny in their profile, it kind of gives the hint that they like you. hes put me in there loads of time over the past few months, especially a little while ago, but not so much recently. we do cute things like keeping points and things and post it in our profiles and thats been up there since as long as i can remember. i also know that when girl number 2 signed on today that she put soemthing of his in her profile, and she imed me and asked me if i ever liked him, and i answered "a little, lol" and then she asked if i still did. i dont know whether or not i should trust her or whether or not i would maybe let him know i like him by telling her.. you know? Link to comment
cara223 Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 im going thorugh basically the same thing haha : / 1 Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Author Share Posted February 24, 2007 Also; he's having a football game tomorrow and has been telling all his friends about it. Girl number 2 IMed me saying that she wanted me to go too, because she didn't want to be the only girl there,s o i agreed but i can't play football and would hate to be embarrassed in front of him and see her showoff in front of everyone. ah guys i need suggestions soooooon! help Link to comment
lifestream Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 If he likes you, he won't care that you can't play football. For godssakes, you're practically best friends!! I remember the feeling of being in love with my best friend and I didn't care how bad she was at something, the fact that we were doing something together transcended that. She couldn't play tennis, but I had fun trying to teach her. I thought it was cute when she'd miss the ball. Maybe he will feel the same way. Personally I find show offs boring... But anyway, GO FOR IT! How will you feel when he DOES start dating someone else? Pretty crappy, I would think. Then you'll kick yourself for not getting the courage to even ask. Don't ask him outright. Do things together, get that chemistry going and see what happens when you're alone. If there's clear chemistry maybe you can hint that he can give you a kiss for such a lovely evening, something like that, but don't tell him outright. Lure him in a little first and see where it goes. Don't let this slip. The risk is completely worth it. I went through it, and although the ex and I aren't "friends" per se anymore, we can't deny that the time when we were dating was one of the greatest feelings either of us had felt in our young lives, and it was worth it in the end. 1 Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 24, 2007 Author Share Posted February 24, 2007 that made me feel sooo much better. he's extremely competitive, yet hes so nice and understanding. my only fear is that this is a really big thing he has set up with a lot of his guy friends, and i dont know if hed be as understanding in a situation like that, you know? when we've hung out in groups before we've never been in a situation like that. Link to comment
Aleadragonhawk Posted February 24, 2007 Share Posted February 24, 2007 Wow, sounds like a lot of drama going on. Just talk to the guy. And if you want to go play football and don't know how? Don't try to fake it. Be upfront - "I want to play, but I haven't before, so be patient with me, okay?" Unless it's a really competitive game, they'll probably be glad to help you learn the sport. 1 Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 25, 2007 Author Share Posted February 25, 2007 haha i love you guys so much! Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 25, 2007 Author Share Posted February 25, 2007 things are going wrong, and fast guys.. the girl who turned him down asked meif i used to like him today.. trying to be a little more outgoing i said, yeah a little lol : ), then she asked me if i still did and i answered with and i dont know : ) i guess it was obvious eneough to her, i dont know whether or not she was checking to see if i liked him so she could apologize and try to go back to him or wether or not she was just going to turn back to him and tell him that i said that, but for some reason he was treating me kind of cool before, i imed him (which is different because he usually ims me first) and some of his replys took 2 minutes or longer, and he was really not sympathetic at all and was kind of sarcastic.. im starting to get really confused. help me Link to comment
lifestream Posted February 25, 2007 Share Posted February 25, 2007 sympathetic about what? Forget MSN. Hang out together. Do things one on one. Develop chemistry just the two of you. Forget other people, they just get in the way. MSN is a crappy communication TOOL. That's all it is, a tool. It's not a measuring stick for a relationship. Besides, it's so easy to manipulate what you write into having it come off any way you want it to. Plus just because he didn't meet your "expectations" today doesn't mean he doesn't like you. He could've had a bad day or something, was busy with something else. You are not his only priority. Take the bull by the horns, girl. Hang out alone, develop more chemistry and see where it takes you. Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 25, 2007 Author Share Posted February 25, 2007 like, when i told him i was going to need patience and help during the game, instead of telling me "oh yeah sure, we'll help you out" he acted very weird and was like 'whatever, if you don't get it you can still be the scorekeeper but you need to like sitting in the cold and have a good memory.' it was really unlike him, a lot, and truthfully i was upset by it. another thing, in my highschool where i live its either AIM or nothing. it seems no one uses the phone to talk to anyone, and if you dont use the computer your out of the loop. its a major source of communication and yeah, i agree, many things get distorted and out of context on AIM. Link to comment
RUNN3R24 Posted February 25, 2007 Author Share Posted February 25, 2007 alrighty guys im off to play some football! Link to comment
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