frustrated with my friend

[jojomugs]

Hi everyone,

I decided to write my story here, seeing nowhere else to go to and talk to. I'm 15 yearold guy, and i have a female friend, same grade. We've met about 4 months ago, got along really well, and became best friends. I've taken her out, as friends, to movies and places, but for the past few weeks it's been different.

 

It's been a few weeks when i began to feel distant from her and i feel that she's been less sincere to me. She barely talks to me anymore, and although we used to stay up all night to talk to each other on msn(messenger), she now leaves after not even 10 minutes of staying online. And during the 10 minutes, we barely talk and i'm making most of the convo. Before, we would just talk on and on about really nothing.

 

So after doing that for about a week or so, i started thinking that maybe i was being too clingy, so i kinda stayed away from her for about a week. Although i thought about her more than anything at school and home, it started to fade off, as i concentrated on other things in my life. But that's only to a certain extent. I really can't stop thikning about her and i really want our relationship back.

 

Another matter is our relationship more than as friends. After 2 months of knowing each other, we stumbled accross the topic of liking each other more than as friends, but we decided that it'd be best to just keep it as friends because we didnt' want to ruin our friendship and both parents were kinda against being together. Now i really regret that decision, and i really want her to be my girlfriend. Recently, i've been thinking about asking her to be my gf, but i'd thought i'd have to fix our relationship back together before asking her.

 

Before i began writing this, i just had a talk with her about out relationship. I bluntly told her that i've been feeling distant and asked her if anything is going on. She agreed with me that we didn't talk as much and told me that there was nothing wrong. We really didn't know what to say until she had to go because her mom starting yelling at her.(It's 2 oclock in the morning)

 

So now i'm just trying to figure out myself, where i am in the relationship with her, and how to sort this out. I really want to have our relationship back again but i really don't know what to do, except being frustrated. Well thanks for reading my long story and any advices in advance,

[tmp0620]

You need to hang out with her in person if you want the relationship back. Talking with her on MSN isn't going to do much of anything for you, I know this from experience. You used to hang out with her right? Ask her to go out and do something with you again, and try to keep hanging out with her, you'll know where you stand with her then.

[jojomugs]

I've asked her today if she could go out this friday, and she said she didn't know. and moments later she told me that she remembered that she was going out with her friend from her old school. Although this sounds really like a lie, i know i shouldn't doubt her since it would just make things worse. I really don't know what to do... : (

[tmp0620]

Well if she came up with an excuse and didn't give you some other time that would be better for her than I say don't initiate conversation with her for a little while. That's a guage, at least as to whether she wants to talk to you or not. Maybe ask her in the next few days to give you a call when she has time to hangout and then leave her alone for a while.

[ghost69]

this doesn't sound good. it seems that she knows you want more than a friend and this is why she is so distant. she likes you as a friend and maybe didn't want more than that. i must say man, once you cross the friendship boundary into hooking up or bf/gf, the friendship thing goes out the window. once people do that, it's like 95% can't go back to being friends after. i know this from experience. i've put myself in that situation a lot of times. i wouldn't ask her to be your gf until you know that she is comfortable with you as a friend again first. since she made an excuse, you should back off a bit. let her ask you to hang out. start talking to another girl. you could make her extremely jealous when she finds out. that should work.

 

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