Angry/Bitter Stage?

[bella321]

I've been in LC with my ex for the past 4 months. It's LC because we work together and run into each other every so often. I IM'd the other day regarding a client issue and he took the opportunity of us communicating to start talking about personal stuff like how he's already had his taxes done and he's paying rent late this month because he spends all of his money on drinks and electronics. And how he's using his tax refund to buy a new really expensive computer. I was so disgusted with his irresponsibility. The reason we split was that he didn't want to take on the responsibility of being a husband, father, owning a home, etc and ultimately I want to be married, have a family and own a home of my own. He's a 33 year old man who makes a good amount of money but is so selfish and irresponsible that he can't even get it together enough to pay his rent on time. Up until this week, I've been missing him on and off and fantasizing that he will change his mind on those issues and we would get back together. This anger that I have is so new to me... is it progress or am I going backwards?

[kekep]

I would say that the anger is progress, and rightly justified might I add!

 

From what you wrote, he sounds extremely self-centered and immature; you are better off without him.

[Orlander]

I wish I could find a woman like you, bella who was looking for someone who is responsible and wants to start a family. Some people just mature at their own rate. Consider yourself lucky you didn't enter into a marriage with him and have to declare bankruptcy because the new Apple iphone was coming out and he needed to spend rent money on it.

 

 

Orlander

[pacopaco]

This anger that I have is so new to me... is it progress or am I going backwards?

 

funny that I basically posted the same thing. I don't know if the anger is forward or backwards either.

[SadOldMan]

I'm very angry atm too. My ex seems to only talk and think about getting her 'cut' from the sale of our house. She even cried and said "if only you'd signed that £25k loan agreement". Grrr

[agent1607307371]

I think the anger is a sign of progress. It means that you recognise that you weren't being treated you in the way you deserve to be treated.

 

Anger is seen as a negative emotion, but it can be cleansing. Just let it go through you and don't get stuck in it and it can be a great motivator.

[pacopaco]

I think the anger is a sign of progress. It means that you recognise that you weren't being treated you in the way you deserve to be treated.

 

Anger is seen as a negative emotion, but it can be cleansing. Just let it go through you and don't get stuck in it and it can be a great motivator.

 

 

this says a lot.

[longhaircats]

bella,

 

I recently went through an anger stage, and it's definitely a progress. I've blamed myself a lot, wishing that I had treated by ex better while we were together. But like your ex, he had tons of issues at age 33 (irresponsible spending, debt, anger issue etc.) and I was unsure about his ability to be a good father/husband. He kept me hanging for 4 mo, gave me a lot of mixed signals. I found out few weeks ago that he is already living with someone else. I was so angry at him. For the first time in 7 months of initial breakup, I felt anger towards him.

 

After few weeks my anger has passed and I accepted who he is and forgave him and myself. I felt inner peace. It was yesterday that I felt happy again on my own for the first time since our breakup. I’m happy because I have so much opportunity ahead of me to meet great guys!