Question for the shy guys!

[ladeedah]

What are some of the ways you have attempted to get close to a girl you liked in a very comfortable, non invasive, non intimidating way? Like what kind of excuses did you give to try to be around her and talk to her b/c you were not ready to ask her out straight away?

[macdomat]

Stop me if you've heard this one...

 

See, In trying to go down the "comfortable, non invasive, non intimidating" route, you'll soon find yourself with a brand new friend. Not girlfriend, just a friend.

 

Do I sound bitter? It's cause I've been there more than once. If you try to make things friendly, you'll find yourself a friend. But that's it. Once you're a friend... it's hard for them to see you as anything else. Not impossible, I suppose, but hard.

 

But... If you wanted to try this route... I guess you need to have something in common. Anything at all: Music, movies, pets, video games (hey, it happens), politics, hobbies, etc. As for excuses for why you wanna hang out with her... just say somethin' like: "Hey, I was thinking about what you said the other day...." and argue some point she brought up. Be confident, that's the best advice I can give you, dude.

 

And hey, if you figure it out, lemme know. I... uh... have a friend who'd like to know as well.

[Timebandit]

Stop me if you've heard this one...

 

See, In trying to go down the "comfortable, non invasive, non intimidating" route, you'll soon find yourself with a brand new friend. Not girlfriend, just a friend.

 

Do I sound bitter? It's cause I've been there more than once. If you try to make things friendly, you'll find yourself a friend.

 

I agree that being friendly but non-assertive will probably lead you to friendship. But what is wrong about being non-invasive and non-intimidating?

[Kevin T]

None. Didn't bother.

[coooolsome]

Don't pick a fight. If she says something you don't agree with, then you can state your side, but don't cause and argument just because you like her. If you like a girl, you need to see whether she might have an interest in you. You have to look at her body language, how she talks to you, 90% of her communication is going to be non verbal.

 

After that, you get her phone number and ask her out on a date. Find out quickly, let her know you intentions quickly otherwise you will just end up becoming friends. Why go through months of agony when a simple question will give you the answer.

 

Also, always be light, positive, fun. That is the key. If you are a fun person, people want to be around you.

 

Example, I went to a house party last weekend at a friends place. Before I got there, the other guys were talking about how cool and fun I was and when I got there, the girls just started talking to me because they knew how fun I am. If a girl is no fun, then why would you want to be with her in the first place, same goes for us guys.