should i ask my lovely sort-of-friend if she'll be my girlfriend?

[Suikoden26]

I have a crush on my sort-of friend. However, we were set up to be friends because we’re both nutters, or at least I am anyway – I have extreme social phobia; she’s an aspie. Anyway, I don’t think she likes me all that much, never mind has any interest in going out with me.

 

She, like me, is very depressed and has low self esteem. She doesn’t talk to me that much, but I overheard her talking to someone in our class about how depressing it was to have people pay attention more attention to her mum and she thinks that nobody could find her attractive. I also feel this way, so I know how much it must affect her self confidence. I sent her an email, saying that there probably are people who find her attractive, but if not then it’s their loss not hers. She hasn’t replied yet and I’m not sure whether are not she would pick up on it as a compliment (or even a ‘flirt’?!).

 

Anyway, I did a fabulous job with her Christmas present, haha. But I suppose that doesn’t mean she’ll be interested in me. Also, the box of chocolates she gave me was smaller than the one she gave to our support assistant – and it was wrapped by Thornton’s. I don’t mean to whine about it, but, it just suggests that she only got me the present for the sake of it.

 

She’s a few years older than me, and I do come accross as a bit childish in my insanity.

 

Anyway, should I ask her if we can be girlfriends, or will that just ruin our already rather one-sided relationship?

[vermilion]

she’s an aspie.

 

I sent her an email, saying that there probably are people who find her attractive, but if not then it’s their loss not hers. She hasn’t replied yet and I’m not sure whether are not she would pick up on it as a compliment (or even a ‘flirt’?!).

 

What's an aspie? Sorry, I know I'm stupid, but I'm curious.

 

Well, that wouldn't really be a compliment. You could have told her you find her attractive. You just said you thought someone might find her attractive. Maybe I'm just over-sensitive but that would hurt my feelings.

 

I don't know if this is a good idea. I mean, she sounds like someone who would bring you down- negative and depressed. But if that's what you're into, because you two are alike, why not go for it? I mean, you said yourself you're not exactly friends so what do you have to lose?

 

Gain some confidence in yourself!

 

EDIT: Are you a woman? Sorry, but I just reread that last part. Because if you want to date her you might want to find out if she's gay/bi first. Unless you meant you want to be her friend. Or maybe you're a guy, I wasn't sure

[Suikoden26]

Oh yeah, sorry forgot to say - yeah I'm a girl. I know she's gay and she knows I'm gay.

 

By 'aspie' I mean she has Asperger's syndrome (type of autism).

 

Really, you think it wasn't a compliment? I would consider it a compliment. I didn't want to be too forward. Hmm, maybe I should try sending her increasingly complimentary emails. I'm not very good at flirting, seeing as I can barely say anything even remotely appropriate. I wish she'd hurry up and reply so I can send her another email. Hopefully I'll get a chance to talk to her again tomorrow.

 

She might not be a very close friend, but she is the closest thing I've ever had to a friend, so I have a lot to lose.