Our date didnt go now we're lab partners

[mysteryman]

Hey,

Well Im doing to jump into this thing, Ive really liked this girl for a long time and we've been friends for a few years. And I've changed my looks and style quite a bit and my love life has insanely improved. Anyhow back to the story, Ive been good friends with her this whole year. And Saturday she logged onto ICQ (Its like AIM) and I asked her to a movie despite the fact she wasnt feeling good. She was at first interested but it kind of died. Later calling me and telling me she didnt feel well enough to go.

 

Well I didn't quite exactly know what to expect today. well in firts block (the only class we have). The teacher was talking about a lab (we have partners and we havent picked them yet, her and i were partners last year) and I figured the girl would choose this boy beside her as her partner. And then I heard my name whispered a couple times and she tells me that we should be partners. To which I reply sure good deal. And then the boy I figured she'd work with start trying to talk her into being his partner and she wouldnt.

 

So now Im a little worried about what Im going to talk to her about? I mean I asked her out the other day. And what if the boy talks her into working with him? And is that a good sign that she wants to work with me?..

Does anyone think I have a shot with her?.. Its just that she is an amazing girl, she's beautiful (pagaent winner) really smart, and a cheerleader who will probaly one day be captain. And I mean I just dont feel Im up to par. Anyhow thanks for any tips, suggestions, opinions, anything. Its a really weird time for me.

 

Thanks

Mysteryman

 

Heres the full story about the almost date

[robowarrior]

Don't care about the what if this what if that, just go for gold, first talk about lab stuff then about fun stuff, going out, and if she would like to come etc etc.

[JimmerJammer]

Hey there Mysteryman,

 

Seeing as how your user details states that you're 16, I'll try to let you in on something that I hope will stick. Its been in my experience that this line of thought can rather be self-defeating. Why? Because by the wording of it, you're focusing on something I bet she isn't even really thinking about and if you begin thinking like that, your behaviour will match it. She will pick up on it and what you don't want will likely come true as a result. In other words, ya eventually if you still continue to think you're not up to par, eventually she'll see it when you don't let up on it.

 

My recommendation is to stop with that thought altogether. If she has something to say about it, let her come out with it on her own. Its not a big deal if you ask her how she's feeling, but the more you make a deal out of it the more it shows you're thinking about it. You want your actions to speak more than your words at all times. I find that words either give away that you think about something too much or that you don't have the guts to do anything yourself.

 

As for this other boy? Don't let him get to you by worrying about him. He gets to you when you do worry and if you let that come out, then you make it obvious that you're concerned about this guy. Worry about you. Focus on you.

 

I'm more curious to know if you know why you feel inadequate or not up to par with her? What WOULD make you up to par? Instead of allowing yourself to be reactive and down on yourself, be proactive and do your best to keep the focus OFF of how wonderful she is and keep your focus on expressing how wonderful YOU ARE. KEY POINT! That's right, how wonderful YOU ARE. I had to repeat that.

 

Hope this helps mate.