pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 alright i know i just made a big mistake i was looking at my exes myspace and i found some things that hurt a lot. i couldnt help but call. we got in an argument over all the stuff shes still convinced she doesnt want to be with me blah blah blah....i told her it was hell not to call her the last couple days. she said i was just playing hard to get!!!!! can NC really help this??????? Link to comment
dnozzle Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 Yes, if you really start doing it. Quit checking her friggin myspage page. Delete the link. Delete her emails. Throw all reminders of her away and get her out of your head. You can't do this half-assed. Either do it, or don't. Everytime you do something like this it will dredge up all those old feelings and you will just get hurt again. She can only hurt you if you let her. NC works if you work it. But you have to really do it. Reading her myspace page is NOT NC. You are still checking up on her. The whole point is to let go and get on with your life without worrying about her. Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 but i dont thiknk the nc is going to make her miss me or realise what shes missing. she thinks im just playing hard to get. she hung up on me, should i text her and tell her that im not playing hard to get but that its just to hard to be friends when i still have feelings for her? i told her that i wanted to give her some space and then we would just talk about what went wrong and how to fix it. i told her that i just didnt want to jump back into a relationship, i wanted to take things really really slow. she said theres nothing to talk about. should i just give up all hope? Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 She isn't an ex at this point. This isn't wordplay: you two are still together! This is a couple bickering. See it for what it is and decide from there. Your real question? Seems to me you are asking how to best mend out this relationship. Is that right? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 she broke up with me 2 weeks ago and she found a rebound guy but he moved to arizona on sunday. she says that we'll never be a couple. Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 i told her that i wanted to give her some space and then we would just talk about what went wrong and how to fix it. i told her that i just didnt want to jump back into a relationship, i wanted to take things really really slow. she said theres nothing to talk about. should i just give up all hope? Then what is this ^ about? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 i told that to her when i called her. when i was explaining the whole nc thing. i said i wasnt playin hard to get. i was just trying to give her space. she said there isnt anything to talk about cause we'll never be a couple again. Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 Look! If she has already jumped into something else with someone new and said that she will never have anything with you again then I would suggest that you move on to bigger and better things my friend. Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 the guy she had moved....she said shes not looking for anyone else i just dont know why she would say i was playing hard to get. and now that she thinks that is nc gonna make her wake up? Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 Ok. Yes the guy moved. Are you looking to get back with this girl? If so then you must stick to NC! I hate to tell you this but your chances of getting back together are not good... but NC is going to help you get through it. And stay off of myspace! its bad. I know from personal experience. NC may very well bring her back to you, but if it does are you sure you are ready to give your heart back to her so she can crush it again? Link to comment
itsallgrand Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 i told that to her when i called her. when i was explaining the whole nc thing. i said i wasnt playin hard to get. i was just trying to give her space. she said there isnt anything to talk about cause we'll never be a couple again. Dude. Ok, so maybe you are still trying to avoid the reality of the situation. Still trying to win her back, hope against hope that she really didn't break up with you or mean it. So what you are doing makes sense to you. On the outside, it doesn't make sense. The girl broke up with you. And you are calling her, talking to her, paying attention to who she dates and who she doesn't date and all this. Time to stop. Take her at her word. It is over. When someone breaks up with you, as hard as it is, you must walk away. You don't call them. You don't pay attention to who they are with. You don't answer their phone calls if they make them. You don't look at their emails if they send you one. You don't look at their myspace or whatever the hell pages they have on the internet. You walk away. NC means No Contact. It works if you do it. good luck. Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 im so confused, i dont know why she thinks i was playing hard to get when she was the one who doesnt want to be with me. and yes i do want to get back with her, but i wouldnt jump into it right away, i would talk about what went wrong and get to the root of why we broke up so we could change. but now that she thinks that my nc is "playing hard to get" i dont know if shes even gonna miss me. Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 Ok dude.... at this moment you still have your pride! dont let her take that away from you! I think that she says these little things to you to keep you on a string for her. "playing hard to get"? listen i know its HARD to do but you do not call her. You need to go out and pick up a hobby to keep you busy. If you do NC she may get a bit curious about your life and come back for some info... Dont let her take your pride. She knows about you and your feelings post breakup. thats more than she deserves to know. NC now! Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 i had done nc for 2 days....before i started nc the last time i had to talked to her was when she texted me at 10:30 saying "hey, i just wanted to say good night" then she called me 3 minutes after that text cause i didnt respond. i talked to her for about 5 minutes and then she sent me a text 10 minutes later that said "whats wrong with you?" that was 2 days ago, and now i broke nc to call her at 3 am. i dont know what to think about the whole "you're just playing hard to get" i cant figure out why she would think that. Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 how long have you been broken up? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 2 weeks today Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 ok thats why. She still has some attachment to you. now dont get me wrong that does not mean she wants you back. how long did you date, and how old are you? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 im 19, shes 18. it would have been a year and 2 months yesterday Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 ok. You know i am going to say your young and there will be more girls out there. so there you go. it sucks i know it may even get harder before it gets better for you but all you are doing is overanalyzing what she is doing and saying. the "hard to get" thing may be her way of keeping you on a string to pull you back in. and she could be using that to put some gult on your shoulders to take away from her guit of breaking up with you. by the way why did she break up with you anyway? what was the reason? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 she broke up with me because i was really jealous, i said some hurtful things, and that she thought she couldnt be herself around me anymore. Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 Ok you need to take this time and focus on yourself. your young and there is more out there in this big world. It sucks to say it but you two are more than likely over. set yourself a goal and do NC for a month then aim for 2 months and so on. Do not talk to this girl. that means if you get an e-mail from her leave it at that. remember NC! lol its hard i will not lie to you. You will get stronger as the days go on. If she is just dying to talk to you then let her know that you will talk to her if it is about getting back together if not then she is interfering with your healing process. good luck. and we are here for you! Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 ok well i went on myspace and i saw this bullentin Dec 22, 2006 9:15 PM Subject I gotta get over him! Body: Damn there is this kid that i NEED to get over otherwise i will drive myself crazy!! But i just cant stop thinking about himm....ahhhh that was yesterday which would have been one year and two months. thats how she felt after 2 days of NC what do you think?????? Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 you sure she was talking about you? not AZ boy? Link to comment
pfc. anderson Posted December 23, 2006 Author Share Posted December 23, 2006 im sure shes talking about me. that other thing was just a rebound for like a week Link to comment
ElegantOverkill Posted December 23, 2006 Share Posted December 23, 2006 ok here is what i think.. she knows you will see that. dont push the issue of getting back together. if you push for it then it will push her away! im sure she knows that you want to get back together. It is in her hands now, she will make it or break it. if she wants you she knows how to find you. I ask that you do not wait for this girl. go and do something productive with your spare time and dont dwell on what she is doing or thinking. I am telling you from experence if you wait then it could backfire on you. Link to comment
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