To all the women...

[Luck of the Irish]

I'm in serious need of a makeover. Not the kind where you put pickles and stuff on your eyes, but an internal makeover. A relationship one. Since they don't have any shows for this where a crew shows up at your house, I will ask on here. So, I will a little about who I am, my situation. Pick it apart, criticize me, call me names, and tell me what I'm doing wrong. If I can find a general consensus, then maybe it's me that's the problem, and not the fact that women can't commit!

 

So anyway, here's a little bit about me. I'm in my early 20's. I'm in the military. I've been going to school on and off, but will finish a degree whenever I get back from my deployment. Good looking, hard working. I look like a typical meathead, military look, but I am soft spoken and articulate. I never get angry, or raise my voice. I have a decent job now and will have a good job when I come home. I have a good sense of humour. I'm not very humble. I'm very old fashioned. I can kill my own food, but also clean my own house. Very protective. I open doors for women and elderly. Pay for everything. I'm into the whole honor and integrity thing, which is why I'm in the military. I'm very passionate about relationships. I'm very loyal and would never even think about cheating, even in bad relationships. I put everything I have into them. I want a wife and kids more than anything. I never come off as desperate or aggressive. I take the relationship at the speed at which is most comfortable. So honestly, if you met a guy like this, would you want to keep him around?

 

Here's my situation. My first relationship failed. It was 2.5 years. We were engaged and had a wedding date. But she couldn't handle commitment and cheated on me. The relationship I'm in now reached the point of both of us knowing without a doubt that we want to get married and have kids. Which is what I've been working for. So I buy a ring, and suddenly she tells me she still has feelings for the ex, and that they've been talking. She hasn't talked to him in months. So, I do the opposite of what I think I should do, I take the ring back and give her X amount of time to decide, before I break up with her completely. I am still with her, and told her I would do whatever I can to help her, but she doesn't have much time to decide. Normally, I would keep the ring, and cling on to hope. I'm a hopeless romantic. But this time, I'm trying this to see what happens. Am I wrong for doing this? Why can't women commit to me? Everything goes so perfectly until it comes time to do the deed. They like to talk and make plans and appear excited, but when it's time to do it, there's always an excuse. Why?

 

All I want is a family. I want to meet a woman who is single, has no emotional baggage, who isn't crazy, and wants to fall in love and all that stuff some day. Do these women still exist??!?! Stereotypically, it's usually the women who fill my uncommitted shoes. What am I doing wrong?

[CluelessGuy321]

I'm a guy who has no experience personally, but has learned much through read, observation, and listening to those who've had much more experience.

 

Turns out:

Good news: Turns out those kinda girls DO exist still in today's day and age.

 

Bad news: It's a numbers game. And some jerk wad might have gotten to them first and have/are messing them up. See, jerk wads operate in way where they have no shame, so the numbers game is in their favor. They'll play the field and weasal out the good women, while guys like you don't date as much and keep trying to make your relationships work when you're not with the best possible gal for you.

 

Remedy: Hell, I have no idea. Maybe make the numbers game go into your favor by dating a lot in college, joining lots of clubs, being social, volunteering, church grouping, getting a seasonal job

@ banana republic or some chic store, and just getting your face out there.

I've acctually read somewhere that women try harder to find men. Many women will acctually flock to jobs where they think they'll have chances of meeting eligible men.

[DizzyDoris]

Luck of the Irish you sound like a hunny, (and look like one, ive seen your picture on that other thread lol ) You're not doing anything wrong. Maybe you just haven't met the right woman yet.

[colors]

Luck of the Irish you sound like a hunny, (and look like one, ive seen your picture on that other thread lol ) You're not doing anything wrong. Maybe you just haven't met the right woman yet.

 

I agree. You sound like a sweet man, with a good heart good head on is shoulders. I think it's just that you haven't met the Right women.

You don't want just any women to commit...so thankfully the wrong ones aren't going threw with the deed.

I dont' think it's you, I think they just not the right women.

[PrincessJOA]

Yeah. i agree with the rest. its not you. its just that you havent found THE girl thats compatible and right for you yet. I hate to say this but its true that many girls out there (even guys) merely want relationships for the sake of having one even though they know they wont go far together. But thats just part of life. you WILL eventually meet the right one, and who knows, she might be the one who propose this time.lol!

[Luck of the Irish]

and who knows, she might be the one who propose this time.

That actually sounds like a really great idea. What a thought! Thanks for the comments.