Can't have an orgasm

[LIBRA0427]

HI,

 

I AM 23 YEARS OLD AND I HAVE NEVER HAD AN ORGASM WITH A MAN NOR BY MYSELF. WHAT IS WRONG WITH ME?? I COULD NEVER TELL MY BOYFRIEND THAT HE HASN'T GIVEN ME ONE. WHAT DO I DO???

[LowPerception1043]

ok first of all, relax! when you are trying to orgasm, don't think too much about it and get all worried about it, everyone is different. you should try to explain to your boyfriend that you have never had an orgasm before, you don't want him to keep thinking he is because then you'll never get one. there are a lot of things you can do to make it easier, the horneyer you are, the easy it will be to get one. i don't know how helpful that is to you but g/l

[LIBRA0427]

BUT HOW CAN I TELL HIM NOW AFTER 3 YEARS? HE WILL BE CRUSHED! I FEEL LIKE THERE IS SOMETHING WRONG WITH ME ESPIICALLY SINCE I CAN'T EVEN GIVE MYSELF ONE. I GET TO THE POINT WHERE IT TICKLES. WHAT IS THAT ALL ABOUT?

 

~ HELP

[Ash]

Does he think you have had one? Or has the topic not come up? I went for many years without my wife having one. It really might not be that big an issue for your boyfriend.

 

Like others say, relax, take your time, and don't try to make it happen. It's easy to get yourself stuck into a loop where you can't seem to get there because you're worried that you can't.

 

I can't give you any specific advice, but you do have to be relaxed, so do whatever it is that relaxes you either beforehand or when trying. Take a bath if that helps you unwind. Try different times of the day, there are definitely morning people and evening people.

 

Get completely comfortable with yourself first. By all means enjoy your boyfriend, but maybe try to step aside from the pressure of making it happen with him until you can get there on your own.

 

He should understand. It's not an ususual thing at all, the way you are. Try not to worry, there's nothing wrong.

[LIBRA0427]

HE HAS ASKED ME, ACTUALLY EVERYTIME WE MAKE LOVE HE ASKES ME IF I HAD AN ORGASM. I FEEL SO BAD TELLING HIM NO, SO I SAY YES. THE OTHER PROBLEM IS, WE BOTH LIVE AT HOME WITH OUR PARENTS, SO WE DON'T DO IT THAT OFTEN. SO HE CUMS FAST. WE HAVE NEVER MADE LOVE FOR MORE THAN 5 MIN. THAT MAKES IT HARD TOO.

[Aura Seeker]

Try getting an aid. Your boyfriend will think it's fun, and maybe it will help.

 

No offense boys....but I wouldn't tell him. It will hurt his ego. Then the whole tone may turn to it being his mission, and pressure gets involved.......

 

Just say.....ya know, I am not finding it so easy...let's try.....THIS! ;-)

 

A

[Ash]

It can be a tough lesson for guys to learn that women don't climax on a one to one ratio. That's just the way it is.

 

I'm not advocating that you tell him now that you haven't had one yet. Or, you could possibly tell him you're unsure of the feelings you're having during love, and that you're confused about it all.

 

Pretty sure you'll need longer than 5 minutes, even when you do get comfortable and can do it yourself. Teach him how to give you foreplay you really enjoy and extend the sessions out a lot longer than 5 minutes. That sould ease the tension you are feeling during.

[LIBRA0427]

I TRIED BRINGING THAT UP TO HIM AND HE GOT ANNOYED SAYING

" WHAT AM I NOT PLEASURABLE ENOUGH FOR YOU" SO I DON;T THINK THAT WOULD WORK.

~ HELP

[Aura Seeker]

Yes, you shed new light saying you live with your parents! That changes everything. Part of me is wondering just how old you are, because I think that makes a big differnce as well.

 

When I started sex, there was nothing really pleasurable about it. I was to young, and so was my boyfriend. When you get two people who don't know what they are doing.....nothing is going to happen.

 

There is nothing wrong with you aside from the fact that you may be to young to be having sex. Boys don't know what they are doing for a loooong time, and neither do the girls.

 

My motto is, if you don't like it.....stop. What's in this for you besides letting him get on and get 'off'? Nothing. Don't do things just because you think it is social pressure, and somebody EXPECTS it. It will be hard to stop with this boyfriend, but maybe with the next one.....don't take it to that level until you are ready. YOU are ready. ;-)

 

Just my opinion.

 

A