God Help Me Get Through This, What Do I Do?????

[shep88ner]

ive been with this girl now for 10 months. we talk often about the future and how our wedding is going to be and what our house will be like. i bought her a $100 promise ring for her and gave it to her the night i left for college. it has both our names engraved in it and everything. ($100 for me is a lot of money). well, for a while i thought college was making us closer. but i just dont know anymore. we've both grown very bold in our arguments and we say the most mean things to eachother. ive got to the point when she cries i dont try to comfort her anymore. it's just all messed up. when i come home on weekends, it seems like all we do is fight. we've "broke up for good" countless times.

 

ive never had a girlfriend for this long. she is only my 3rd girlfriend and im 18 years old. my longest before her was 3 weeks!!! i really love her a lot and i cant let go. her family is SO good to me, and my parents LOVE her. my sister is even in her marching band squad! to everyone else we seem SO so perfect. we're the "cutest couple". but behind the scenes we're always fighting and yelling and saying mean things. tonight i traveled to an away football game (1 hr away). it was pouring rain and it cost me $6 i didnt have so i could watch her final marching band performance. we had a little argument before the game and when i got there, she ignored me. she glanced at me 2 times the whole game. she usually talked to me, wanted me to sit by her, she'd call me to do stuff for her...all that. she didnt even LOOK at me until i was about to leave. we said NO words. i sat there and got soaked and watched our team lose...again. i had it set in my mind i was going to end it tonight for real. but we got together after the game and had the normal "bad fight". i couldnt bring myself to do it. it would change my life SO much and she's really all i got since i have NO friends in college (im really shy). i talk to her all the time to make myself feel good. but it's so hard on me to keep doing this. we're both extremely jealous and we disagree on almost everything. she hates my drinking habits, i hate her flirtationsness.

 

i jsut dont know what to do, i have my own little plan to see how this weekend goes, then if it stays like this, im ending it this weekend for good (seriously this time). but i just dont know. because when we're not fighting, we really are the perfect couple. i just cant let go, and i cant bring myself to do it.

 

anyone have and comments or anything? i just really need to talk to someone about this...what should i do???

[AwdreeHpburn]

THIS IS GOD...(just kidding)

 

Maybe you two need a little space and time to slow things down and take things a fraction less intensely..........??

[Derailed]

You still love her? And for all you know she still loves you?

 

Then don't break up, dammit. Don't give up until you've done some fixing. Please, I don't wanna hear anymore, "dump her, just move on, there is somebody better for this guy, history repeats itself, etc. etc. etc."

 

If there is a fighting chance, STAY TOGETHER. Until you can't. Youre young. You need to learn how to handle relationships. Trial and error is the only way. Keep trying until you can't anymore, or until the love is gone. As long as its still there, keep nurturing the relationship. This is considering that your love is still mutual.

 

Have a serious talk with her. Keep it calm, and keep it sincere. Tell her what you told us here. Write a letter explaining how you feel if you have to, if only to express yourself better.

 

Goodluck. I'm rooting for you.

[shep88ner]

thanks Derailed! yea, i do still love her and i care very much for her. its just sometimes i dont always know what to do. we fight so often and we've got into some pretty seriously mean arguments.

 

talking to her might work out well. because i guess one reason i am considering ending it is because she doesnt think id ever do it. she thinks ill just put up with her crap forever and id never have it in me to actually say it's done. so i guess to put her back in perspective i had the thought of just moving on and being serious about it. but talking to her and telling her straight up that it's over for good unless there are some serious changes made and im honest, i think she might come around. or if not, then maybe we shouldnt be together anymore...who knows