I like him but...

[Chisama]

Hi. There is this guy I like. We both went to the same high school and he was my prom date. We hang out at the movies or his house and then we dinner afterwards at a Japanese restuarant (on more than one occasion) and we call or chat with each other often, if not everyday. There are time I wish I could hang out with him and all, but we go to separate colleges and when he comes back in town ( during the summer) we might go out.

I told him i liked him one day. But all he could say was that I am his, "very,very,very... best friend." I was happy he did shoot me down too hard. But what does this mean?

I have another problem that might have lead to my reaction to get me to say that or even now think that, but I have to save that for another forum.

Overall, What does this mean? Many say he is in denial or that I did it out of jelousy so he wouldn't go out with other girls. (he was planning to date someone. But he didn't go. He didn't really like her, but didn't want to hurt her feelings. So he stood her up. I didn't agree to that and said he was wrong for it.)

[Lubber]

Youre in the friend zone. Its this inescapable box of companionship that refuses your emotion to escape.

 

Ive been there. We all have I think, one time or another.

What I think causes it is if you wait too long to tell that person how you feel, they become content in the idea of you as a friend.

 

Personally, I dont think he's in denial. He just cant see you that way. I liked this one girl for 5 years, but since I was in the friendzone the whole time, couldnt move on. After about the 7th time of me asking her to be my girlfriend she seriously pondered it, and responded saying what difference would there be with our relationship now? We would be acting like we are right now except we would have all the physical benefits.

 

Whats there to gain besides all the physical stuff if he went out with you?

I know you want to, I wanted to with her too, but think about it. What does he have to gain?

 

Its tough sweetie, but its one of those things that we have to be careful with

 

(If it makes you feel better, I got over this girl and we're best friends now. Hung out with her today and went to the beach as a matter of fact. Time heals all wounds.)

[Chisama]

Thanks. That just could be it. I haven't been out with guys actually at all minus a high school crush. (wasn't much of a relationship besides the first kiss) but all in all it is hard and very lonely like this. I should focus on school and be patient a little longer. I try, but then again me being the way I am ( constantly working and very little knowlegde about dating) how am I suppose to know?