Sex on 1st date?

[nemo_lost]

There's this girl I've been in contact with for about 3 months who works at another office branch of my company. Mainly we've kept in touch by email but we've met a couple of times at company functions, and there was definitely a bit of chemistry and flirting. So I finally asked her out and we went to dinner and then got some ice cream when she suggested we go to her place. Needless to say one thing led to another but we mainly just made out, then ended up falling asleep. I, personally, don't like to go past that on the first date, especially if I really like someone. I want to ask the ladies (and guys if you have input) out there if you ever feel rejected, or think less of a guy, becuase he doesn't at least "try" to have sex? If a guy did what I described above and you wanted to have sex from the start, would you give the guy a second chance assuming you had a great time otherwise with the guy and you like him?

[arwen]

I wouldn't feel rejected at all. Just ask her out on a second date! In fact, if a guy starts to hint sex on a first date, it will in most cases mean he's not looking for anything serious. Not in all cases, but esp. if you date someone you didn't know before.

 

Ilse

[AngelEyez]

Hey Nemo_Lost,

 

I think you made a good decision. This means you want her for more than just pleausre. She will probably understand that. Ask her out on a second date and see where things go. I've been going out with my boyfriend for 3 months now and he still hasn't gotten some. He gets offended sometimes, but I've told him my reasons. He sympathized with me and said "Okay, whenever you're ready." I respect that about him. He didn't just up and leave because he knows I have more to offer him than just sex. Hope all goes well.

 

AngelEyez

[Maverick32x]

I think as long as you still are pretty physical with the person, they wouldnt feel rejected... If she tried to kiss you and you said no, i think that would probably make her feel kinda rejected... but if you guys kissed and all that... I doubt she thinks she got rejected

[shikashika]

no she would feel not rejected..

 

If she rejected you because of that... then its not worth it!

[nemo_lost]

i'm wondering if i should bring it up at all? should i just wait for her to give me the signal that she wants to have sex? i usually just go for it right off the back, but it's weird how you think differently when you really like someone! argh!

[arwen]

Oh, you don't have to bring it up. Actually I think that bringing it up will make things more awkward. You really like her, so call her and arrange for another date, and see how it goes from there.

 

I think most girls would be happy to date a guy who could spend the first night kissing and cuddling without it leading to sex directly. It shows you care for more than that and that you are romantic, I think.

 

Ilse