Confused by friend's actions

[emilykay15]

Me and a guy friend of mine, who also happens to be my HS classmate, have been spending more time together for the last few months. I would say at this point that he's a very close friend but don't want to assume anything more than that. Anyway, after hanging out with just each other for so long, recently he's started bringing along a guy friend of his, who also brings along a girlfriend or date I'm not sure, and ever since it's been an outing of 4 people instead of just us 2. I don't know what to make of this, and a part of me wonders if maybe he's trying to show in an indirect way that he doesn't want just the two of us hanging out anymore or what. But really, what does it mean & what if it continues in the future?

[vermilion]

He could just like hanging out with all of you. I don't think he's trying to say he doesn't want to be with only you. Sometimes, being in a bigger group of people is more fun than just two people.

 

If it keeps on turning out that the 4 of you go out instead of just you two, Just tell him you'd really like to spend some time with him next time. And you can say it's just that you miss being able to talk to him alone. And if you're worried he'll think it's because you want to date him you can stress that you're not interested in him in that way.

[emilykay15]

Guess I need to clarify that currently I'm not against the idea of dating him. I'm open to the idea & just wanting to see where things lead, but by no means am I actively pursuing him. thereforeeee I was wondering if the fact that he brought along another couple is any indication that he's trying to indirectly hint or establish us as a couple? was I on a double date or just a 4 people group outing (where 2 of the people happen to be a couple)? Can't tell for sure.

[Ms. Babydoll]

I really don't know what to say. Maybe you should tell him how it makes you feel, at least then he'll see what he is doing wrong.

[vermilion]

Guess I need to clarify that currently I'm not against the idea of dating him. I'm open to the idea & just wanting to see where things lead, but by no means am I actively pursuing him. thereforeeee I was wondering if the fact that he brought along another couple is any indication that he's trying to indirectly hint or establish us as a couple? was I on a double date or just a 4 people group outing (where 2 of the people happen to be a couple)? Can't tell for sure.

 

Yeah, I could see that and was actually thinking that. But since you never said you were interested in him I figured I could just tell you how to spend time with only him.

 

He could be thinking that inviting a couple along will make you think of dating him or realize that he has feelings for you. But I sort of doubt it because I just don't think that guys think this way. They don't usually come up with plans like these where he's merely suggesting something in an extremely subtle way.

 

But, if you're interested in him I think you should suggest taking your relationship a step further. It couldn't hurt. Even if he's not interested you can still be friends, even if it's awkward for a little while.