PhilliesFan001 Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 How old was your partner? Do you wish you had waited until you were older, do you wish it had happened sooner, or was it just right? Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I just got married a few days ago and I'm 16 and as of right now, I don't think I'll ever regret getting married young. Link to comment
jdk77 Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 Im sure this isnt what you want to hear.... but wait until you are older. If you love each other, what difference does it make if you get married now or in 5 years? Live with each other first and learn the other persons flaws (because face it, no one is perfect), and then see if you are able to deal with them. Its alot easier to walk away when you dont have a ring on. Its better to wait and find out then have to go through the emotional distress of dealing with it a couple years down the road, only with lawyers and paperwork. If you're meant for each other, you'll get married in due time. Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 If you love each other, what difference does it make if you get married now or in 5 years? That's exactly true though. We were going to wait until I was 18 to get married but when he planned the surprise wedding, the time was just right. I love him will all my heart and I know he feels the same. Love is not an age, it's maturity, trustworthyness, and many many more things. Link to comment
numbly_hypersensitive Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 Eeek. Skads. I got married when I was 19. Bad choice for me. He was 21 and we "grew up together" in our marriage. I had my first child when I was 21 and my second when I was 25. I'm now 34. And divorced. I was hard to grow up with another developing human being. We grew in different directions and things ended badly. Was it because we were so young? I will never really know. All I know is that he wasn't the one for me and I knew that before we got married, but because I was so young, I felt I really didn't have any other choice, and no one in my life explained it any differently. So, out of that I have two great kids and an ex. Happy marrying! Link to comment
justpaisley Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I was 20, he was 23. I don't regret getting married that young at all. I do regret not postponing the wedding a few months so more of our friends and family could have attended. We've been married 5 and a half years and we're happier than ever! Are you thinking about getting married at 18? Link to comment
helpme2 Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I got married at 18, but I was really mature, I had lived on my own alone for 4 years already, and had a job of my own and everything. I don't agree with the moving in together, if you want to make a marriage work you need to know who you are, what you want, what you need, if you know those things, then you are much better able to choose a good life partner than if you know "what he's like when he's sick" If you are really considering getting married though I can't stress enough the value of a good premarital counselor, going through extensive counseling beforehand should weed out anything you might need to discuss and will really help you to understand both yourself and your partner. There should be a place in your area that will offer it for free or little cost. Link to comment
MollyElise Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I got married a few months ago, I am/was 26 and hubby was 27. 3 months, so far so good. Though, regardless of age, I think adjusting and learning during the first year is a challenge. Everybody is different, but I don't think I would've been ready for marriage until I was over 25, too much fun single stuff to do when you're younger. Link to comment
PhilliesFan001 Posted September 15, 2006 Author Share Posted September 15, 2006 Ohh no, haha sorry, me and my boyfriend are not thinking of marriage at all. I just asked this question because I was curious. I don't want to get married until I'm out of college and settled with a job, and he doesn't want to get married to anyone for another few years so that works out pretty well. Link to comment
justpaisley Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 If you are really considering getting married though I can't stress enough the value of a good premarital counselor, going through extensive counseling beforehand should weed out anything you might need to discuss and will really help you to understand both yourself and your partner. There should be a place in your area that will offer it for free or little cost. Loudly, robustly seconded. Link to comment
maasikus Posted September 15, 2006 Share Posted September 15, 2006 I was 23 and he was 27. We did not consider our age at all. We just knew we were ready for it and this is where we wanted to be. We are happily married for 2 years now. Link to comment
crazybeautiful Posted September 18, 2006 Share Posted September 18, 2006 I got married at 18 and my partner was 18....now im 19 and he's still 18 lol. For us it was now or never because i was moving due to the military. Sometimes i wish we would have waited because of some bull * * * * he did while i was in bootcamp. Link to comment
Ipso Fracto Man Posted September 19, 2006 Share Posted September 19, 2006 I was first married at 15 (to a 17-year-old girl) and I recommend it highly. The marriage may not last for squat but your kids will have you kicking around longer. For the record, I'm sort of half-joking but the ages are true. Link to comment
redrose85 Posted September 20, 2006 Share Posted September 20, 2006 not before 30? I've never seen myself getting married that far in the future. I think that if things keep going the way they are with my bf, we'll be married after we're done school, and have some careers. Probably around 25-26. Link to comment
baybrat Posted September 20, 2006 Share Posted September 20, 2006 I was 18... he was 23. I was very mature for my age. We waited 7 years before having our first child. By the time I was 30 and life happened with all it's ups and downs... I discovered what a poor choice I'd made. At 18 I had no idea who I was or who I needed to spend the rest of my life with. I used to say I wish someone had taken me aside and told me to wait... but I probably wouldn't have listened. If I could do it all over again knowing what I know now... I'd wait 'till my late twenties to get married... at least! Link to comment
CamGuy Posted September 20, 2006 Share Posted September 20, 2006 That's exactly true though. We were going to wait until I was 18 to get married but when he planned the surprise wedding, the time was just right. I love him will all my heart and I know he feels the same. Love is not an age, it's maturity, trustworthyness, and many many more things. Sorry to be the * * * hole here, but you will be divorced by the time you are in your twenties. Love IS an age sweetheart. You have no idea how much work it takes, let alone how well you will be able to handle it once things get tough. This isn't the same like it was in the 1500's. Times have changed. Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Sorry to be the * * * hole here, but you will be divorced by the time you are in your twenties. Love IS an age sweetheart. You have no idea how much work it takes, let alone how well you will be able to handle it once things get tough. This isn't the same like it was in the 1500's. Times have changed. I've never taken comments about me personally. It's a good thing to learn Link to comment
helpme2 Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Sorry to be the * * * hole here, but you will be divorced by the time you are in your twenties. Love IS an age sweetheart. You have no idea how much work it takes, let alone how well you will be able to handle it once things get tough. This isn't the same like it was in the 1500's. Times have changed. you know I heard that a lot from my family when I got married at 18, in fact I also heard "you won't last 6 months" and then when we did "you won't make it a year" and so on, until the last thing we heard was "let's see you make it past 5 years" well, we will celebrate our 6th anniversary next month, and I guess they were wrong. You know it would have been nice to have people who would try to support us instead of those waiting for us to fail. Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 you know I heard that a lot from my family when I got married at 18, in fact I also heard "you won't last 6 months" and then when we did "you won't make it a year" and so on, until the last thing we heard was "let's see you make it past 5 years" well, we will celebrate our 6th anniversary next month, and I guess they were wrong. You know it would have been nice to have people who would try to support us instead of those waiting for us to fail. Growing up, my mom always told me "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." and I've done that all my life. I just wish others would too. Thank you for backing me up. Link to comment
helpme2 Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Growing up, my mom always told me "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." and I've done that all my life. I just wish others would too. Thank you for backing me up. hey I have read your posts, and I find you to be intelligent and level headed, I think you will have a wonderful marriage and you and your partner will be great parents. just remember though the first 2 years are tough, keep communicating and everything will be fine. Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 hey I have read your posts, and I find you to be intelligent and level headed, I think you will have a wonderful marriage and you and your partner will be great parents. just remember though the first 2 years are tough, keep communicating and everything will be fine. Thank you. I know that being this young and being married is going to be really hard and we both know we're going to have to work at it but we love each other and want to spend the rest of our lives together. Plus, we're having a son in a month Link to comment
CamGuy Posted September 21, 2006 Share Posted September 21, 2006 Haha. Well, im not here to tell you want you want to HEAR. Nor am I here to please the masses. I just speak my mind and tell it like it is. So have fun trying to make it work. Look at it this way..... Perhaps by me telling you both that you were stupid to get married that young will just give you more of an incentive to make your marriage successful. Cheers. Link to comment
helpme2 Posted September 22, 2006 Share Posted September 22, 2006 Haha. Well, im not here to tell you want you want to HEAR. Nor am I here to please the masses. I just speak my mind and tell it like it is. So have fun trying to make it work. Look at it this way..... Perhaps by me telling you both that you were stupid to get married that young will just give you more of an incentive to make your marriage successful. Cheers. I just wonder how you can objectively prove that she was (or I was) stupid to get married... Link to comment
Ians Mommy Posted September 22, 2006 Share Posted September 22, 2006 I just wonder how you can objectively prove that she was (or I was) stupid to get married... I would like to know why you think we're stupid too.... Link to comment
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