Help me... I really want to call him now.

[MyTeddyBear]

Talk me out of it. Please!

my story:

[gattsuga]

Absense makes the heart grow fonder... I dunno, maybe NC is too early for you. But if I were you, I'd call him and demand a good explaination. He sounds scared, and reluctant to commit. But the way you two ended the conversation sounded kind of like a weird way to end such a good relationship.

 

If you do decide to call him, don't cry or start begging him. Just ask for a good explaination of why you two are through and it won't work out.

 

in my opinion, NC is only good to heal yourself after a breakup (meaning you don't expect him to come back). But I think you deserve a good explaination of why he suddenly cut you off from his life. And if he refuses to give that to you, then procede to NC.

[BornToResist]

Don't call him! He ended the conversation badly and said over and over to simply let him go.

 

So let him go. Do not crawl back to him, he doesn't want it. Just let him go.

 

I'm so sorry you're hearting honey!

[MyTeddyBear]

i just called him. it was short since i had to go pick up my daughter at the bus.

i asked him, how he was doing? he sighed, and said ok.

he said, it's so weird not talking with you.

i said, it's probably good for us right now.

he said, i don't know what's best, i don't know anything.

i said, i gotta go now, but maybe we can talk later tonight.

he paused... and said tonight, ... not tonight.

in a few days. at the end of the week.

he said, is that ok? like he wanted me to say, why don't you call me sooner?

but i didn't. i said, that's fine. take care of yourself.

he said, i don't have to tell you to take care of yourself, you always do.

Huh? what does that mean?

 

strange...

[Jayar]

What is left to say? He's already given you the only answer you need. A relationship takes TWO people, and without him in it you are the only one left. What will talking to him change?

[gattsuga]

You two are grown adults... tell it to him straight. to me he still sounds unsure whether or not he wants to break it off or not. If he can't give you a reason, that's being really selfish. Then it's time to initiate NC... and yes it's going to be rough, but it's honestly the best thing you can do for yourself.

 

oh, and for him to be saying 'you can really take care of yourself' could just be a compliment from him... i wouldn't think too deeply about it

[MyTeddyBear]

you're right... we are adults but he doesn't seem be handling this like an adult.

will he call at the end of the week. who knows? if not i'm done. this is beyond ridiculous.

and if he's seeing someone else, damnit, just tell me.

how frustrating!

[BornToResist]

That conversation doesn't show me any indication that he wants things to change or that he wants to be with you.

 

He already made it clear what he wants. He probably does miss talking to you although he doesn't want to do anything to get it back.

 

I suggest you stop calling him and give him his space. Take his advice and let him go...

 

Sorry if this is harsh but I don't know what exactly you are trying to get out of this situation, it seems pretty clear to me.

[Crazyaboutdogs]

he doesn't seem be handling this like an adult

 

When it comes to relationships, I have noticed that many adults don't behave like responsible adults....sigh.

 

Your guy is very confused. It has nothing to do with you and everything to do with him. Don't call him, let him contact you. He wants to break things off so let him come to you if he wants. You will never get sufficient explanations from him because he is too confused. Maybe if you are out of his life for a while he will realize what he is missing. Take care of yourself and your children. They are your top priority.

[MyTeddyBear]

BornToResist:

I know you're probably right. it just doesn't make sense. but i'll have to accept it... some how.

thanks for being honest.