Daddy Bear Posted August 29, 2006 Share Posted August 29, 2006 I am all alone The walls are tight around me Then I break the shell My eyes are cloudy I twist and turn and struggle Then I shed the skin The Eagle grabs me She carries me to my doom Yet I am in flight Link to comment
CarnelianButterfly Posted August 29, 2006 Share Posted August 29, 2006 Bite her foot and end up a snake splat... Kidding aside that was wonderful. Link to comment
PRSOV Posted August 29, 2006 Share Posted August 29, 2006 Certainly a snake bite, ouch... Good poem though Link to comment
brando Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 not bad Bent. The Eagle grabs me She carries me to my doom Yet I am in flight the last two lines seem of contradiction of one another.. death and freedom. Im not sure. Perhaps their is a hint of defenselessness.."yet i am in flight" Maybe i am reading into it to deep. Link to comment
Daddy Bear Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 it's irony. the eagle will eventually rip his guts out, but in the meantime shows him the world from up high as he's never seen it and could not see it without her. Link to comment
Luck of the Irish Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 So did you name your snake reallybent? Link to comment
yeawutever Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 Kool poem and yea if a snake bite were to really happens, boy that's gotta hurt. Though I heard a few poisonous snakes can bite and yet you don't feel anything at that moment. Either way, yikes!!!!!! Link to comment
TheRedQueen Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 This is officially your best yet. On so many different levels this poem is perfect. You managed to utilize and compile 45 words in such a seemingly effortless way that upon reading it, they exhaled what I perceive to be an eternal truth. Big Ups Brother Bent! Link to comment
Ms. Babydoll Posted August 30, 2006 Share Posted August 30, 2006 It's beautiful, like Gecko said,like the irony, well done Link to comment
Daddy Bear Posted August 30, 2006 Author Share Posted August 30, 2006 thanks, gang. your comments are very uplifting. oh, little Queenie... any praise from you is like sugar on the tongue. here your flattery has filled my mouth with the sweetest honey and left me temporarily without voice. Irish: the winning entry, submitted via PM, was Sabine. your inspired suggestion was so hysterical, though, that i declare it to be her middle name. Link to comment
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