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Love and Reason


Dr. Faust
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(This is sort of a long post)

When in a relationship, or if you want to be in a relationship, think with your heart, not your mind. If you over analyze, weigh options, and try to use logic in any way to help you, you will probably fail. Instead of using your mind, try going with what just feels right, even if your mind might tell you it's wrong. Furthermore, to prove that I didn't just suddenly think of this idea, I'll give an example that I went through (and still go through in a way).

 

There's this one girl that I've had a crush on ever since freshmen year of high school. However, I thought she didn't like me, and just wanted to be friends, but as it turned out, she did like me, her parents are just overprotective and didn't want her in a relationship. Her parents aside, I still took this girl (I'll call her Sharon) to homecoming dance, and that sort of thing. Things seemed okay, until I met a friend of Sharon's at her birthday party (I'll call her friend Jenn). I started talking to Jenn on AIM a lot, and she was nice, funny, and just a great person to talk to, even when we just talked about nothing. So, I started falling for Jenn a little more, but I still had a crush on Sharon. Moreover, I started to weigh my options, such as "Would I be more happy with Sharon or Jenn?", and this is when my problems began. I started to try and reason out love, and since love is an emotion, you cannot use logic and reason with it (Psychologists have even shown that critical thinking and emotions, such as love, use different parts of the brain).

 

Junior year came around, and Jenn invited me to her school's homecoming dance (Jenn went to a different school than Sharon and I). I really wanted to go with her, and said yes. However, I didn't invite her to my school's dance, because it was coming up in about 2 weeks, and from my experience, girls like to be asked much earlier than that (I over analyzed). I also thought that maybe I shouldn't get too involved with Jenn, because I've had bad experience with relationships with girls that go to different schools, which seemed logical at the time. So, instead of taking Jenn, I took Sharon. We ended up having a good time, and a few days after the dance, we became a couple. I'm still not sure why I asked Sharon out instead of Jenn, but I'm sure it has something to do with me being young and stupid. I would have also told Jenn that I had a girlfriend, but work, homework, and athletics got in the way of me being able to call her. The few times I did call her, either her sister or her mother answered and said that she wasn't home. Eventually, I did get a chance to talk to her, but by then she already knew, and we had a fight of course. Actually, it wasn't so much a fight, as her calling me a jerk, and me agreeing with her.

 

About 4 months passed before I started talking to Jenn online again (I still can't figure out why she talks to me), and since then, we talk a lot, usually every time we're both on AIM. We're both starting our senior year of high school; she has a boyfriend, I still have a girlfriend. I have strong feelings for a girl that I only talk to over AIM, and who will probably never love me because of that stupid decision I made during my junior year. So, don't combine reason and love.

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