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Seeking Advice...


Dragoe
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welcome to enotalone. well, it sounds like she just likes you as a friend. and it's not so bad to have more friends! but, as far as a relationship with her, it seems she isn't interested.

 

don't feel bad - it happens to everyone at some point. just keep on out there - meet new women, hang out, have fun, join some clubs in college. you'll meet a good girl for you soon enough

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Do you have a chance? Maybe, but I think your best bet is to, first, work on the skills that you need to date, so you can get out of this rut. And then once you have some, you'll need to get out there and practice, a bit, then sets your sites on something you really want. And if it is here, then so be it. You may change your mind.

 

First, skills you need is just to know how to talk to people. Sounds like it's natural, but many screw it up. Second, you need to learn to read body language, because that is the language of love, and you cannot see it over AIM. Third, you'll need to find some crutches (by crutches I mean gimmicks that help you have some confidence), so you can get out there and begin to chat women up. Fourth, you need to learn how to ask them out, and then go from there as to where to go with them, etc.

 

There's no reason you cannot do this.

 

And welcome to the forum.

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Welcome to ENA!

 

Don't be so hard on yourself here, you stepped up to the plate and delivered. Whether things ever happen with this girl or not, you've made a huge effort and that is what counts the most. Being shy and lacking confidence is over come by experience. Experience is gained by putting yourself out there more. As for this girl, who knows what the truth is, she seems flighty but because you were able to establish a good dialogue with her your expectations of a positive outcome with her were high. Hey it's not your fault you didn't pick up on any signals that she was dating someone, she probably concealed this fact for a reason.

 

Don't allow her to play games with you, take control by not corresponding with her. Ignore her for a week or two, she will get the hint that you have no interest in her as long as she is dating someone else. Mean while you need to get back out there and collect some more experience! You're on a roll, don't stop now!

 

RC

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