I cant come out

[mytruecolorschik]

Hi first time here and my first post is heavy so sorry but I really need some advise. Here it goes I am a mom of 2 and I am currently in relationship with the most beutifull soul that has walked this earth he is a great man and he treats my kids like his own, problem is I am just accepting the fact that I am a lesbian. Its been very hard I have talked to him about it to some extent I told him that I didnt want to be witha man but that I really loved him and want to be with him we are just currently not having any type of physical contact none at all, but I am no fool its all gonna get to a point that we are gonna have to go our separate ways.

 

Right now I havent told anyone else cause I am in such a bad situation that its just not possible if I come out I would have to move away and that is not possible me being in such a bad financial situation and then the only people that are around me is his family and a couple of people I know but we are not that close me and his family is, well anyway his fam is really religious so I know that they would totaly ex me out I have no support right now none at all he doesnt say mean things or anything but is clear about not accepting gay being ok so right now I feel like I am in a box alone I am so depressed by thought of having to live in the closet for years to come and then my kids I wouldnt want them to be ridiculed.

 

I have got to be in the weirdest situation ever finding out that I am gay is hard but accepting it is even harder to actuallly say it is uncomfortable. I am sorry for rambling on just had so much to get of my chest. Question is what is a gay mom living with a man in a heterosexual relationship traped in the closet supposed to do.

 

thanx for reading my post and any advise or input.

[loveualot]

hello... i must say that you should have realized this b4 marrying him.. it may hurt him if yuo do.. plus your children now...but we live life only once... so try to talk it out with him tell him you still love him if you do n u would want anotherelation.. it may not wrok out... or you may try for a long distant relation which may make you happy dear...

[mytruecolorschik]

We are not married and we dont share any kids together we live together right now we have to keep things this way.

[FoxLocke]

oh my, quite the predicament.

 

Not to make light of your relationship, but since you aren't legally married I think this might be easier for you.

 

Yes, you have to take the kids into consideration...However, what good are you to them if you are in a marital facade? How can they be truly happy if mom isn't? And what about your loving partner? It isn't fair to him. Being that you don't really adore him the way that you should...

 

Overall, this has to be your decision. It will hurt, but you have to go with what is right to you.

[Tigris]

I was married and in a similar situation as you. Luckily I have no children.

 

It's taken me 30 years and 2 marriages to realise I've been a lesbian in denial all my life. I didn't love my husband anymore but still cared about him. He knew about the problem 6 years ago and we tried to work through it. We managed for a while but the longer we were together the more I wanted to be with a woman.

 

I'm marrying my wonderful fiancee next year in July.

 

PM me anytime. My MSN address is on my profile if you want to chat. If you want to know more about the situation I was in read my personal posts.

[loveualot]

ok if you not married then i guess it will be much easier for you dear... it will hurt him... but you too should be happy too ... so i would advise you to go for what you want!obviously the kids will be wondering after qiut sum age... but if your love them like ne mom would i guess they will accept the fact then. take care!