Getting my ex to move on

[xxsandmanxx]

I broke up with my ex girlfriend about 3 months ago. We had a fight almost everyday so I decided to end things. Now she shows up to my house uninvited every other day begging me to take her back. I dont love her anymore thereforeeee I dont want to get back with her but it really makes me feel bad to see her suffer like that. Is there anyway that she will finally get the that we are not getting back together. The plot thickens she has attempted suicide twice so its not like I can tell her to off because I am afraid that she is going to kill herself. I am really concerned that she is going to show up at my house while I am with another girl and go all crazy. Whatever ideas you guys have I would really appreciate I am going crazy trying to figure this out.

[princess81]

Tricky of suicide is serious thing and you should be very carful but at the same time dont let that keep from being honest let her know once how you feel exactly how you feel let her know that you wish to have no contact with her for the time being and if she doesnt take your word for it then let your actions speak louder get a restraining order to keep her away from you its hard but you are obviously over her and ready to move on and you should have that right.

[stolenshadow]

If your relationship was healthy (no abuse involved) then it really has nothing to do with you if she decides to end her life.

It's sad, but those things are nobody's fault, she has severe problems and she needs professional help.

 

Try to avoid her as much as possible, don't talk to her and don't open the door if she shows up, you already told her the relationship is over and even if it's hard for her she has to see the reality of it too.

Because, if she believes her depression is having an effect on getting you back she won't want to get better either.

 

But I repeat, it doesn't sound like her problems are because your relationship ended, she should go to therapy.

[joyce1412]

if it were me i think i might send a letter to her, something along the lines of:

 

dear ___,

 

i think it's best for the both of us if we do not stay close and in contact so that we may both move on. i care about your happiness and well-being and think highly of you, but i just came to realize that we aren't right for each other. i think distance will be the healthiest thing for each of us.

 

you're a great girl, and i know you're going to have a great life. i wish you all the best.

 

sincerely,

___

 

 

basically, just let her down gently, be as kind as possible without giving her any hope for reconciliation.

 

and i agree, it is not your fault that she is suicidal. a healthy person would never kill herself JUST because you broke up with her. so try not to feel guilty, unless there are some harsh words you said or harsh things you did to her in the process of breaking up--in that case, apologize and be done with it. that's the best you can do.