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Hi all, just wanted to let it out... It's one of those days when I can't stop thinking about my ex... I know he hurt me, disrespected me and even sent a fax to my work to say goodbye... yes via fax. That is because I wouldn't pck up his calls, strict nc for me, but it doesnt make it any easier. The memories of 3 years are still alive and within, and I'm just feeling down, like it's never going to get easier... I wish he could have loved me, but he didn't , no matter how much I loved him, he just treated me so badly... I guess I have to take a look at myself and ask why I let him treat me so badly, why did I put up with it, how come I took him back time after time, and why now, when I have finally said "enough", I feel so horribly sad inside... I really thought he was the one.... how wrong could a person be... Anyway, that's how I feel right now...

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I've learnt things the hard way......Its not what a man says....its what he does that counts. We listen to their words and believe them at face value. When really its whether they are racing accross the city to meet you because you had a tough day....or whether they cancel watching their fav baseball match to cook you dinner......

 

Its the actions.....that speak louder.

 

I didn't watch the actions......I should have and am in the same place as you.....every day he is on my mind...All my friends thought he was a nice guy...but he turned out to be the biggest jerk EVER I have dated!

 

You can't blame yourself for being human and falling for someone and for feeling...That is the essense of being human...and you are strong to allow yourself to truly feel. What I'm going to do now, is not let this heartbreak stop me meeting someone who is truly worth the measure of me. Im going to watch their actions...and I'm gone at the first sign of jerkdom! We go through this for a reason. I guess so we can appreciate someone good when they do come along. We should try and see the silver lining in the clouded sky! See the positive. See the sun. Pick yourself up! You deserve TRUE LOVE! I mean it! YOU DO!

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It's pretty common to have these left-over feelings for an ex, especially at around 2 months. It's enough time to miss someone, and enough time to reflect-- also, I think people tend to block out ALL their emotions for a while, and then suddenly they come flooding back. A guy I was with a couple months ago recently began contacting me like crazy, going through everything in his mind, and trying to get back together with me. He treated me very poorly as well, but you know what? I still felt emotions rise up. I had buried them. But the emotions are ok and normal, and dealing with them when they happen is good. I was upset over the weekend, but now I'm back to feeling fine with everything. I'd never go back to him. I grieve over the loss of someone I was intimate with, that I loved. But he really isn't the reason I felt sorrow-- it was the loss, the pain, the grief revisiting. It will eventually heal.. but before it does, I wouldn't worry too much about the days where you feel it again.

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Yes blklagoon, trust me I am with you.... for me, it's because this is the one man I loved so much, wanted to marry, lived with him, but I guess it was never mutual. Whenever I would hear from him, my body would go into a state of almost shock, my heart would be quickly, and I would feel sick, just from all the pain associated with him. I never loved anyone so much, but no-one ever hurt me as much as him... He sent a fax to my work last week telling me goodbye because I wouldn't speak to him, it's more like I couldnt actually, I was frozen... I know deep down he didn't love me because NO-ONE in love would ever treat me the way he did... this site really helps when you are down and need support, that's why I will be eternally grateful to everyone here and their advice... thankyou.

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