5 Years Differance

[bLiNd]

Ok well heres the rundown basically,

 

I am 18 turning 19 and she is 13 turning 14 we both live in Canada & she claims to be madly in love with me. I have tried to avoid this situation a ton of times by now but she seems to end up right there, But for all the right reasons!

 

I have no ashame admitting that im seriously falling for her and that she doesnt appear to be young mentally (hell im the one who acts more childish at times).

 

I have researched this to make certain that if anything does go further i wont find myself is a heap of ****. I did run accross this so it helps to easy the mind slightly: link removed

 

I guess at this point in time i just wanna see what other people think of the situation to give me ... uh ... confidence!

[I Love a Canadian]

Um...

I'm sorry.

 

But she's a child and not capable of the love of which you are capable at this point.

 

Trust me. There was a HUGE difference in me between 13 and 16. The man I was "Madly in love with" at 13 wasn't the man I thought he was.

[redandblack]

That age gap is far too wide. She's just exiting puberty. You're an adult. Think about it.

[ariyadhana]

I, personally, don't know what a 19 year old would want with a 14 year old.. People go through a lot of growth in their teens, and at 19 year are pretty much an adult, at 14 you are really just starting to learn about yourself and make that transition. Also, the age of consent is likely going to be increasing in Canada to 16 very soon. What do her parents think about this? I defintely wouldn't allow my 14 yr old daughter to date a 19 year old. Be careful they dont nail your * * * when the law changes.

[Tigris]

Welcome to enotalone.

 

As far as I'm concerned 5 years isn't too big an age gap. What I am concerned about is the fact that she is still in her early teens and that doesn't look very good for you. A lot of people probably including her parents and your own will be horrified about the situation.

 

Is it possible to talk to your parents about her? They know you and we don't. If you had their backing then you could all go and talk to her parents. That way they would realise you came from a decent family who are prepared to do the best for everyone. There could be a chance that both families could become friends and then you'd be able to see each other more often.

 

Personally I advise you not to be alone with her on any occasion. That way you will prove to her parents that you have honourable intentions and not just wanting to have sex.

[bLiNd]

Lol yea your all basically right & nothing any of you just said HASNT gone through my mind!

 

The parents thing (hers) is hard beocus her paranets have alot of issues with "Her" and ive made it very clear to her, Unless they know and sgree i dont plan on being nothing more then just really really really good friends!

 

Also dont anyone get me wrong i dont go for younger chicks (whats the point) but this is one of those freak situations & i am having a very hard time dealing with it due to the feelings shared by myself & her!

 

She has all the qualitys that my gf (for 6 years) never had and even that plays a big role in this whole situation .... Anyhow please keep up with the comments! They all help me to figure this out alot better!

[DropToZero]

Hey man, I'm gonna throw my opinion in here, because...I went through the same exact thing about this time last year. I'm not going to give all my details, but if you want to talk more personally just PM me, and I'll let you know what I went through...then maybe you can understand what you may be getting into...I'm not putting it all out on here.

 

And for anyone who isn't here to help...i.e., would rather bash him for looking into a girl that young, or her for "falling for him" and how it's not possible...please, dont...you don't understand. This is definitely one of those situations you must BE IN to truly understand what's going on. Cause a little more than a year ago I would have been saying the same things as you to this guy...god did that change.

[bLiNd]

DropToZero please PM me.

 

For some reason my PM options are limited & i cant send one

[Sally00]

18 years old.... and 13 years old??

 

Dude...... she's too young to even know what love is.

This is just infatuation. I'm sorry to tell you that. But it's true.

 

5 years difference is no problem when ya'll are older... like in your 20s atleast.

[bLiNd]

Lol yea easy to say... But its hard to walk away you know!

 

If it was so easy & if i knew for certain she wasnt just "Saying" these things i would not have let it drag on this long at all!

[Wazbinbee]

Bottom line is - it's illegal, you would be classed as a paedophile, you could be jailed and your life ruined

[DropToZero]

18 years old.... and 13 years old??

 

Dude...... she's too young to even know what love is.

This is just infatuation. I'm sorry to tell you that. But it's true.

 

5 years difference is no problem when ya'll are older... like in your 20s atleast.

 

Again, like I said...don't bash, don't tell anyone they're too young to know what love is...yes it may seem that way, and it may be, but don't judge when you don't know.

 

It's not bad when you're older, I agree, but...I'll say this again you really have to GO THRU this to understand it. It's not like this guy woke up today and said, "yeah..I'm gonna go get involved with someone 5 years younger than me"...it's more than likely something you never thought would happen to YOU...cause that's how I felt.

 

I'll PM you when I get back soon, I've got to go and eat something.

[DropToZero]

bLiNd, you have to go into your User CP and set your options. Right now you have private messaging blocked. Try and find it, hit User CP in the blue line at the top left, then go to Edit Options along the left side, and then scroll down to private messaging, click the box and allow it.

[FoxLocke]

Yeah, in highschool an age gap more than two years is huge. 19 and 14 are like dog years.

 

Go with someone your own age.

 

If she feels the same way about you when she's 20 then I say go for it.

[bLiNd]

DropToZero, Im not seeing that option!

[avman]

blind you will be unable to use private messaging until you hit 10 posts. That's a restriction we have on the forum to prevent spammers and pornographers from doing damage here.

[bLiNd]

Thank you for letting me know that

 

Its a great addon as a matter of fact !

[Managor]

18 years old.... and 13 years old??

 

Dude...... she's too young to even know what love is.

This is just infatuation. I'm sorry to tell you that. But it's true.

 

5 years difference is no problem when ya'll are older... like in your 20s atleast.

 

You can't say this person is just infatuated. It's very possible for someone as young as 14 or so to develop feelings for a person.

 

Bottom line is - it's illegal, you would be classed as a paedophile, you could be jailed and your life ruined

 

If he waits until she's 14, and they live in Canada which I assume, and both parents concede, then it's not illegal under Canadian law, at least the current law.

 

Anyway, I do think the age different is too much. You may be the same maturity, you might be really close and would do well together, maybe not, I don't know, but the public's view on you two would probably be pretty awful, including her peers at school and your parents' perhaps.