should I watch what I say?

[JessieK05]

Ok, me and my boyfriend been dating for almost 2 years, and around July 4th, he dumped me but only for a mere 15 hours. His reasons for dumping me was that , well let me start over, I brought it up because he was acting weird and first he said we didnt have anything in common adn he only loved me like a friend, then after we got back together he said it was because when i brought up breaking up he thought that was what i wanted and he got scared and tried making up excuses not to hurt me. Then 15 hours later, he begged for me back saying he made a mistake and didn't mean to hurt me, and that he loved me, and he felt like half of him was missing, and that he took me for granted, so i gave him another chance. Ever since then though I've felt that I've had to watch what I say because angering him or arguing with him I might make him break up with me again...should I be feeling like that or what?

[Smokeycat]

Hey JessieK05,

 

If you're in a relationship where you have to worry so much about what you say and do then is it really worth it? You shouldn't have to have the thought "What if he breaks up with me?" running through your head all of the time. Having to deal with all of those emotions is too much unnecessary pain and torture to your heart and mind. Be yourself around him and if he doesn't like it and breaks up...it's his loss! You shouldn't have to change who you are and act differently around someone who cares about you!

[Seraph]

definitely, smokeycat.

 

Jessie, us guys can be crazy sometimes. In my opinion, the definition of a relationship is like a two way street. It's a mutual thing. Being with someone should make you feel very comfortable (at least most of the time... we all have our fights ) So I guess I would say, go ahead and be yourself, say things that you would have said before July 4th.

 

On the other hand, I totally understand and sympathize. I have found myself in the same situation plenty of times. So, in retrospect, I probably wouldn't be taking my own advice. to be honest...haha. But I guess check out your priorities. If the relationship is strong enough, I dont think an argument will break it, if he cares for you enough.

 

But like smokeycat said, "if he doesn't like it and breaks up...it's his loss!"

 

Best of luck!

[JessieK05]

Thanks guys, I think I'm just going to say what I want to say, and if he gets mad and dumps me i suppose it is his loss. Just kind of afraid of being alone I guess . My friend said that if he came back for me I must be doing something right, so part of me is thinking that if I say what I want it wont care because he loves me anyway, but I dont' know, I'll be talking to him tonight hopefully when he gets home from a concert.