What To Do Next?

[Cute Band Rat]

I posted about the breakthrough with my 'ex" last night.......now the million dollar question. How do I proceed from here?

 

1)HE asked me to call HIM last night. Which I did...and we a a GREAT talk.

 

2) When the conversation ended, he asked ME to call him back when he returns from out of town

 

Yes, I initiated the conversation that led to all this..but now I want to

somehow have HIM take the "lead" so to speak. I think it's best considering that HE seems interested again. I want to get out of the role of the pursuer....so I was thinking of simply leaving him ONE email or voicemail and letting him respond.

 

Any suggestions? I REALLY REALLY don't want to screw this up now......

 

Thanks all!!!!!!!!!!!

[mikeca]

well...damn..hmm is it possible to make your self busy when he gets back? that way he has to phone you..

[Cute Band Rat]

Yeah..it is......

I was thinking of waiting a couple weeks before I make contact again....

and then just send a quick flirty email ..

[sadk]

I know where you're going, but I'd be real careful here. This two weeks thing ... I personally wouldn't react well to that. I'd see it as either apathetic or game-playing. I have a radical idea. Make sure you're sitting down.

 

Tell him how you feel. Call him as agreed, have a chat, and make it fairly short, then end with, "You know what? I think I'd like you to call me the next time. Okay?" No drama, no tone, just be straight.

 

Being able to do that will show him how strong you are.

 

Sean

[Cute Band Rat]

Thanks Sean. I appreciate your honest comments and I think you are right.

I will contact him as agreed....keep it short, light flirty.....end the call first and say "give me a call"......my only problem is WAITING lol.

I want to leave him wanting more......how can I do that? Last night he was WANTING to see me!!!! Only I wasn;t available...

Ideas?

[sadk]

Yeah, I have ideas. If my ex made it clear she WANTED to see me, and I suggested Saturday, and she said, "Oh, I can't on Saturday. Give me a call during the week. Maybe next weekend" that would make me very excited and a tad crazy. And if later on we got back together and I found out she was totally free that Saturday ... I can just see how she'd tell me with this massive grin on her face ... "I had to make you wait. I wanted to know you were serious."

 

And I'd say, "You realize it made me crazy."

 

And she'd say, "Of course."

 

I would be paralyzed, but I would have no ill feelings. (This kind of happened in a different way. She and I started out as writing buddies, just e-mailing. We hadn't even spoken by the time we realized we were falling in love. One day she sent me a few links to pictures of her daughter. At least that's what she said. There also happened to be pics of her on that web page if I looked beyond the links. After we got together, I asked her if it crossed her mind that I'd look around for pics of her. She grinned and said, "Of course!" Women can be so devious.)

 

Sean

[walkingwithaghost]

i think it's kinda of a bad sign if he keeps asking you to call him. i think it's also bad that you think just one wrong phone call or email can screw everything up. if someone likes and cares about you everything won't get screwed up by one bad phone call. unless this boy is shy or has some weird personality/telephone disorder if he keeps telling you to call him something is wrong and to me that's almost insulting. i had one experience with a boy who kept telling me to call him (he didnt even ask for my number!!) he was 25 and a lead singer in an nyc rock band and i was a 17 y/o retard. all he wanted was a "sexy fling" (his words) so i would be suspicious of any guy who ends a conversation with "call me on saturday" it's pretty insulting. imo. i dont know youre entire history with him and maybe this is how he rolls cause he's weird. also im high maintenance. if you keep calling a boy you're chasing him. if he asks you to chase him by saying "call me" you're still chasing him. you know the guy better than i do. but to me it seems like he's just being friendly with you and youre taking this for much more than its worth. im also in a bad mood right now so maybe my advice is jaded. but think of a movie and a guy telling a girl to call him every time they talked... does that sound like a role you would want to play (sorry for the lame analogy)... good luck..

[walkingwithaghost]

either call him on saturday and be yourself or don't call him at all. waiting a couple weeks is stupid and a waste of time in my opinion. at this point you would only be playing a game with yourself anyway...

[Cute Band Rat]

Hahaha Ghost, I understand where you're coming from and I agree. I DON'T

want to be in the role of the pursuer anymore.....I kinda wanna toss the ball back in HIS court .....because man SHOULD pursue woman. Thats how I feel.