he ditched me for that?!

[HeatherPresley68]

I posted a topic before about how I didn't like that my bf would look up pics of the sluttiest girls he could find on myspace. Everyone said that I was overreacting and that all guys do that. I had tried to accept it after that. But then one day my bf and I planed a date to go to a movie we had both been wanting to see. I waited and waited and about an hour and a half after the movie had started he finally showed up. I kept pressuring him as to why he was so late and after a bunch of excuses he finally admitted that he had been looking at dirty pictures on the computer. I feel so hurt he would have wanted to do that so much that he wouldn't care about breaking his date with me. It seems so disrespectful to me. Am I just overreacting again?

[annie24]

um, not all guys look up photos of the sluttiest girls they can find on myspace!!!

 

it is one thing to look once in a while, and it's another thing to have it get in the way of your life and relationships. if he is late meting his gf because he was looking at photos, I think it shows he has a MAJOR problem.

 

I think you should reconsider if you want to stay in this relationship. No, it is not normal to be disrespected in this way.

 

Does he feel he has a problem? does he want to get professional help? It sounds like he may have an addiction to porn/internet.

[HeatherPresley68]

Thanks for your words annie. The last time I posted about this type of topic everyone said I needed to chill out. I'm glad I'm not the only one who feels this is wrong

[annie24]

porn doesn't bother me at all. let me start there. and maybe just looking at the myspace girls can be just a guilty pleasure, but I think that's a slippery slope, as he can start contacting those girls!

 

If I caught a boyfriend checking out dating sites though, that would be the end of that relationship. (myspace isn't technically a dating site, more of a networking site, but it is a slippery slope. I have a myspace account, I have met a few guys, but mostly I use it to stay in contact with old friends)

 

But.... porn/internet becomes a problem when it starts interfereing with your life. It's one thing to look at porn for 30 minutes on a sunday night, but another thing to be late for a meeting with your gf. 1.5 hours late! Why did you stay so long?

 

Has he ever been late to his job, or had other problems in his life relating to the porn?

 

there could be 2 things going on. he may be addicted, or maybe you are not a priority in his life. Both are problems.

[HeatherPresley68]

I was at home waiting for him to pick me up. I wouldn't have waited at the theatre that long. He said that it was a one time thing and I want to believe him. today is our year and a half anniversery and I'm really hoping that this won't happen again. As far as I know porn hasn't been a problem for him other than this one occasion. thanks again for your advice

[Süsser Tod]

I look at porn, my gf also looks porn, and we look it together. No problem with porn with my gf nor my ex-gf.

 

 

However, porn is like any other thing out there, with moderation it can be good, if it becomes an adiction, then you have a problem. Guess he could have an adiction to videogames, would you be so upset about it?

 

I think not, because it would not be hurting your self steem in the looks area, only on the appreciation area.

 

However, it is the same problem whether it be myspace pictures, porn, videogames, etc. and he should be aware of that and work on that, even conseling if he needs it.

[HangingInThere]

well my ex of a few weeks created a myspace acct shortly after i told him i wanted a break fromour relationship.

 

he sent me an invitation to myspace via email - he said it was a mistake and he didn't mean to that....but how does someone inadvertently type in my email address, select ok, then confirm the 'ok'. ????!!!!!!

 

anyway, i went to his site - he had down that he was in a relationship and was there for Networking....i let it go on and from time to time during my space fromhim i would check his myspace to see who he added as a friend. the 1st few days he had about 50 half naked women (some pornstars, strippers, and scantily dress women), then it went up to 80, then 100, then 150, in the course of a few weeks!

 

ok dude, you going thru something in our relationship and you are stress but yet you are here flirting and adding these women as your fren....i mentioned it to him, but i didnt't make a big deal actually i didn't make any deal about it!

 

oh, i asked him what the hell is he networking for? women!!! he felt stupid (i can tell) and he didn't reply!

 

anyway, your bf sounds like he has an addiction and you need to talk to him about and let him know how you feel

 

needless to say, my bf and i are no longer together - and seeing that myspace crap going on, only made it a bit easier to dismiss our relationship!