Should I be bothered by her Ex?

[Hotboy645]

Ok, lets start out like this. I have been with my girlfriend for almost 3 years now and we have a 2 month of child. Everything is going well. I previously in a 9 year relationship and have a child from my past relationship as well. My new girlfriend was in a 6 year relationship before I came along. We are both friends with our exes. She left her ex-boyfriend and they remained friends afterwards. I don't have any problem with that because I am friends with my ex. What I do have a problem with is that he calls the house so often. My ex never calls the house because she says she would not want my girlfriend to feel uncomfortable so she calls my cell phone. My current girl no longer has a cell so her ex calls the house. This week he has called everyday. I never had a problem with it but I am saying to myself why does he call so much. Part of me thinks that he is still into her. I trust my girlfriend and I know she wants me but it bothers me that he calls so often. I have not brought it up to her because I don't want to be petty. Should I be bothered by this. Just for the record when he does call they talk right in front of me.

[skyjuice]

Hi

 

At least they talk right in front of you. That means they open and honest about their conversation and has nothing to hide.

[Hotboy645]

Should I bring anything up to her or just don't worry about it? I feel like asking her why does he have to call so much. How much can you two have to talk about?

[RayKay]

I would just talk to her about him, not in an accusing way, but just ask what he has to talk about so often? Start the conversation. Maybe explain to her that sometimes it makes you feel a bit uncomfortable when you are spending family time, that he calls so much and interrupts that (maybe his intention).

 

I would be uncomfortable, actually very uncomfortable, with an ex calling everyday. I am pretty alright with friendships with ex's, but there are boundaries and limits.

 

With your case, you and your ex have a child, so it is expected there would be some contact, but it sounds like even so she is respectful of your girlfriend and family, nor do you need to talk everyday!

[Aschleigh]

I would ask your girlfriend to set some boundries. I would ask her to ask him to not call at all unless there was an emergency. Or at the most once a month. What do they have to talk about anymore?

This is not ok, he is still very attached if he calls everyday. She may be fine with his attachement too.

Talk to her, tell her your feelings, ask for what you need.