Is this good technique?

[Aueft]

Pretty basic thing going on here-

 

I was flirting with a girl before school ended, and eventually got her phone number. I called her about a week later and asked her to go to the movies- she couldn't go, but it was a "positive rejection", if that makes sense. It wasn't an excuse or anything. Well, that was about three weeks ago.

 

Now, I know, I know- I've waited way too long- but I'm going to be calling her tonight to ask her on another date to a movie with a friend of mine and his date. Here's a general synopsis of what I plan to say- (Keep in mind- we're not involved or anything, she had thought of me as 'just a friend' until I asked for her number. This is me just trying to take her out and eventually further things) Right, went off on a tangent- here it is:

 

1. Call
   
2. General "what's up" crap
   
3. Ask how her summer is going
   
4. Tell her that I cut my hair (Last time she saw me I had long hair)
   
5. Now- this is my clever little segway When she asks how it looks I'll go "Well- why don't you see for yourself on friday? A friend of mine is bringing a date and, well- I'm inviting you."
   
6. Get the response- end the conversation

Less than 5 minutes. So then- I know this is a little bizarre but I'm the kinda guy who has problems acting on his thoughts without reassurance, so; how is it? Anything I should say or change about the conversation?

Thanks in advance.

[cacain119]

nah, I think it's good for what you're trying to do. Just be confident about it.

[macdomat]

I TOTALLY USED TO DO THAT!!!

 

Absolutely! I totally used to plan out my phone conversations with women beforehand. Half need to impress with conversational skills, half desire not to totally go off on a tangent and say something stupid...

 

But I'll tell ya now, it's gonna deviate from your script ('cause that's what it is, a script). And you gotta let it! Don't sit down and write out everything you wanna say. The first major phone conversation I had on the phone with a chick (ahem.... woman) went on a total tangent, and it went better than I could ever had planned. "It is the unexpected that happens."

 

My advice? Don't overthink this. And DO NOT time yourself. If you're staring at the clock, the conversation is gonna feel rushed, and it's gonna be over in all of like, 30 seconds. Don't let there be a lull in the conversation, either, though. Know when to end it. The BEST advice I can give is to ask a lot of questions. You wanna know everything about this chick (woman... whatever), and you want her to know that (without looking like a total creepy stalker).

 

And... uh... save the hair thing. If the conversation goes that way, fine. I understand and appreciate the need for small talk before you delve into the serious stuff, but... this is asking for a date, not a car loan.

 

Don't overthink. Take 3 deep breaths... and pick up the phone, NOW!

[inspiration]

i just ask her how she is doing and what is going on then get to the point.

 

"You should come to dinner with me 'here' and I'll pick you up at 'time'"

 

Takes less than 2 minutes. I talk when I go out with them not on the phone. Everyone has their own thing though I guess.

[Haven]

Haha, nice. Maybe you could say "I'd like you to come with me," instead of "I'm inviting you"? But the conversation sounds good. Good luck!

[Dating Coach]

I called her about a week later and asked her to go to the movies- she couldn't go, but it was a "positive rejection", if that makes sense. It wasn't an excuse or anything. Well, that was about three weeks ago..

 

A positive reaction? Could you elaborate?

 

I'm going to have to disagree with you here. You said it wasn't an excuse, but it's been three weeks and she's never bothered to reschedule with you, call you, hang out, anything? Sounds to me like an excuse.

[Aueft]

Postive meaning that her reasoning for not being able to go was totally legit.

 

And- she doesn't have my number, it's blocked and I forgot to give it to her. >_>

[shadowcat]

i dunno but to me it sounds like this chik aint interested no more..but i dunno its up 2 u if u wana give it on more shot

[Dating Coach]

Postive meaning that her reasoning for not being able to go was totally legit.

 

And- she doesn't have my number, it's blocked and I forgot to give it to her. >_>

 

What was her excuse?

 

I still don't buy it. She didn't reschedule another date with you? She didn't ask for your phone number? All it looks like we have is a excuse and not attempt on her part.

[shadowcat]

its obvious she aint interested, yo man keep ur eye out for other girls