what is this really? love or...

[surya]

i know of someone who is in a relationship right now with a guy that she has known for about 3 yrs. they are inseparable and it almost looks like it is a relationship for keeps you know. but when i listen to what she says about her feelings for him it does not match up. they really do care for each other they are the only persons that they each trust first and foremost. well actually they are best friends first. but even though he may voice to everyone that he is without a doubt in love, when i speak to her, she feels more of a brother sister relationship, but when it comes down to the nitty gritty of things no other man can a hold a candle to her one guy.

 

this is where the problem starts. even though they are so close and so intimate with eachother they are still virgins after all this time, not by her own volation if it was left up to her. she literally, if losing one's virginity was like throwing rice at a wedding she would have been pelting hands full at him. but he has not caught a thing. so it is almost as though the roles have switched, he is not the one begging for it, she is, and because nothing is forthcoming she gets frustrated etc. men don't realize how easy they let their women walk into the arms of another man.

 

his best friend who happens also to be a good friend of hers apparently, there was always some underlying tension between him and her. and once they started talking about issues in her relationship, the tension began getting stronger but it was still kept on the down low. but now she has asked the best friend to take her virginity and the only thing stopping him from actually doing so is that thebest friend and her boyfriend have been buddies since preschool or something as far back as that. but things changed once she started really explaining to him how she truly felt. apparently they both feel strong desires for each other, and it is more than just lust. and the best friend is now willing to, once he realized that she really does get worked up over him, to "help" her out. so she is now in a worry asking me what to do but all i can do is wonder because it is a tingly situation, very delicate in nature and i quite frankly have no answers to this one. obviously the two would get attached if he took her virginity but then what is the situation with her boyfriend????

[Momene]

I'd tell your friend that she needs to communicate her feelings to her boyfriend and if they can't be resolved, she should split from him.

 

Losing her viginity to another friend while still dating her boyfriend? NO WAY!!!!

[sddeaston]

men don't realize how easy they let their women walk into the arms of another man.

Haha. Takes a sleezy woman. Takes a sleezy best friend. Tell her she should just leave. Get out of his life. Let him have the chance to meet someone that deserves him. She doesn't. Ha ha. Not a chance. I hope she does it and gets found out...cuz in the long run, for the guy, he would be better off. Your friend should grow up.

[surya]

well that was what i thought but then relationships are so tender. . anyway she IS deciding to break off the realtionship so we will see.

[nottoogreen]

well that was what i thought but then relationships are so tender. . anyway she IS deciding to break off the realtionship so we will see.

 

OK, her BF maybe bi++/gay. I say this because a) women are mostly off-limits outside marriage (shariah law). b) From my conversations with friends in middle east more than half are bi. c) I got hit on too often when in middle east.

 

And she should not throw herself away.