Question about NC

[Johnathan]

Is it only NC if both people mutually agree not to have any contact? How about when someone breaks it off and there is no discussion or mention of keeping in contact?

[Psylocke960]

For me, NC means that I WILL NOT contact him in any way shape or form so that I may use all the time I need to heal and help get through this. My ex has tried contacting me a few times (He broke it off) but I did not and will not respond until I feel ready. Who knows, I may never contact him even if he does. We'll see, but I am on day 26 of NC.

[Johnathan]

For me, NC means that I WILL NOT contact him in any way shape or form so that I may use all the time I need to heal and help get through this. My ex has tried contacting me a few times (He broke it off) but I did not and will not respond until I feel ready. Who knows, I may never contact him even if he does. We'll see, but I am on day 26 of NC.

my question is did you two agree to have no contact or did it just end without any mention of that?

[Psylocke960]

my question is did you two agree to have no contact or did it just end without any mention of that?

 

No, he has no idea I'm implementing NC between us. So it was never mentioned during our break up. I believe I've read on here that some people do tell their ex's about NC and both parties agree to it. Basically, NC could just be for you or for both involved.

 

I'm sure others on here have a better way of explaining it since I've just started using it myself.

[ocrob]

The purpose of NC is either to try to get the other person back or move on. It is obviously more healthy to do it to get over the person. I say that if you want to stay NC, then you do. If he contacts you, the you will have to decide what you want. If he wants you back, then you will have to decide if this works for you. If he contacts you and just wants a friendship, then don't do it if it does not work for you. If he has not contacted you, then try to move on. If he does, then figure out the circumstances and make a decision that works for you.

[AwdreeHpburn]

Is it only NC if both people mutually agree not to have any contact? How about when someone breaks it off and there is no discussion or mention of keeping in contact?

 

 

In my opinion - No Contact means there is no contact from one person to another. Whether one or both parties are clued in is, to me, irrelevant.

 

If you are done and want no more contact, do not contact or allow contact.

 

That's just my two cents, take it for what it's worth.....

[nicorette]

as to whether you talk about the fact you will be going NC, i think that you shouldnt, unless they keep calling. if youre starting today, lets say, dont call them. dont call them ever until you are healed (depending on how long you heal, but NC should at least be for a few weeks, but you probably wont be healed then, and even if you are, perhaps its best if you dont contact them).

 

so pretty much from now on just do not contact them. now, if they happen to contact you, just dont reply. if they continuously do it, id say to tell them to stop contacting you unless they want to reconcile (that is, if you wnated to get back together with them).

[heloladies21]

For your situation, you're going to want to do NC because there's nothing left to say. She understands your position and it's very clear by her words and actions that she doesn't want anything further, so it's time for you to refrain from anything else with her.

 

No need to announce it or make any agreement to stay out of touch. She probably won't contact you anymore so it's best if you do the same.