Good phone strategy early on in dating process

[NubianLove]

hello everyone this worked for me, the guy I've been talking to for a couple of weeks, we talked late at night, and he had to get off the phone, and said he'd call me back. Now from the past couple of weeks, I sort of know he sleeps early, and so after an hr when he hadnt call back, I sent him a text message saying that he should go get some rest becos it is past his bedtime, that he shouldnt worry about calling back and that we can talk tomorrow with a smiley face, and goodnight. I got a text message back saying "thanks you are the best, we'll talk tomorrow".

 

I knew he would have tried to call back, but since it was late, I knew it would be more so a "calling you back becos I said I would, I'm off to bed", so I knew I could flip it by sending the text becos

1) it shows I'm considerate

2) that I know him and his sleeping hrs, folks like to feel u understand them

3) It helps him out just in case he did forget he was supposed to call back

 

The funny thing is that in my previous relationship, I would have been waiting for him to call, or I would have tried calling back after waiting, thus invading his space, and turning myself into this "nagging, insensitive female". I read this book "Women Men Adore", and it really hit it hard for me

[Geno101]

well it really depends on the man. because i have deprived myself of so much sleep to talk to my girl or call her back. sleep is uninteresting to me when i want to talk to her bad enough. Lol. Thats just the truth. if you would've texted ME and said that, i would've called you and talked anyway.

[NubianLove]

We had already talked for the evening, so its not like anything else I had to say or we had to talk about was that important that it couldnt wait till the following day. I guess the thing is that I've talked to him enough to know that talking to him at midnight is almost a lost cause because by then he's almost asleep, and he has to wake up really early for work.

I'd say the above prob applies more to females.

[Geno101]

We had already talked for the evening, so its not like anything else I had to say or we had to talk about was that important that it couldnt wait till the following day. I guess the thing is that I've talked to him enough to know that talking to him at midnight is almost a lost cause because by then he's almost asleep, and he has to wake up really early for work.

I'd say the above prob applies more to females.

 

yeah i figured. I understnad what you're saying though. but, i dunno...even if i had talked to my girl all day, i'd still stay on the phone..we'd both stay on the phone, even in silence sometimes, no matter what we had to do the following morning. We just love the company of each other.

[Daddy Bear]

Nubian, when i saw the word "strategy" in your thread title i was prepared for the worst, but what you describe honestly sounds like an awesome way to think.

[Geno101]

yeah, i agree. that is great. It reduces problems and small unnoticed annoyances. thats good.

[NubianLove]

yeah i figured. I understnad what you're saying though. but, i dunno...even if i had talked to my girl all day, i'd still stay on the phone..we'd both stay on the phone, even in silence sometimes, no matter what we had to do the following morning. We just love the company of each other.

 

I understand that though, went thru that stage previously, not saying age might have something to do with it, we're both about 26.

I think as a female we are programmed way too emotionally that 1st instinct when he hadnt called back within an hr would be to get pissed off, and start making assumptions he doesnt like me", "Maybe I'm not important", never minding he just told me earlier in many words that he does like me, and I'm important. By the time u do talk, ur emotionally worked up and that could lead to conflict that could have been otherwise avoided.

[GottaLetItBurn]

yeah that was nice and considerate. Atleast it showed that you weren't playing some BS game. You just put the smiley face to show you cared and all.

 

It's really repulsive when a girl doesn't call back when she says she will or tries to come up with an excuse not to talk.