worried :/

[sammeh]

hi,

I last left a message here a few weeks ago and as much as it helped i still cant seem to over come the fear of rejection...i think it is bcuz i have got in my head that i am the uglyist person on the face of the earth bcuz i havent gotten with anyone for a long time, but how can i tell if am or not that is for other people to think this is what it is confusing me.

I was in a club the other week and it was full of females i found very attractive, but couldent bring me self to talk to them or even if thay are looking at me to smile or wink or to even acknowledge them i just turn my head away. This is starting to really really get to me so much so i have though about suicide bcuz i feel so lonley. I just need some way to overcome this fear, also when dancing would it be to forward to go behind a girl and start dancing with them?

 

thanks for your time in reading and helping..

 

sam.

[Gaeltick]

Hi Sam

 

Hey listen it is perfectly ok to drink yourself into an alchoholic coma over a girl. NOT! Just kidding. But, never ever mention the S word. That will not help you get a date, now will it? Try a less dramatic approach to meeting women, otherwise all you'll be meeting is nurses (not bad) if you do attempt the unmentionable. . . which you won't, right?

 

The dancing idea could work, I've danced with people that have danced into my space. Just don't be grabbing anyone from behind, that would be asking for trouble.

 

Don't confuse shy , which can be quite cute in its on way, with ugly 0X . Unless you resemble him 0X , you should have nothing to worry about.

 

Good luck;

 

Gael

 

 

[segagirl]

Hi there Sam, I must agree...there is not correlation between being shy and being unattractive.

I would think that approaching a woman from behind (to dance) would show you have some ability to put yourself out there....... I would also suggest being careful about doing this. I don't think most of us like any old person moving in with no warning.

In regards to being shy, the best you can do is continue to work on your self-esteem. Practice with friends, and just take a chance and put yourself out there. Maybe a club atmosphere is not the place for you; try something a little less intimidating. Like a coffee shop, school, work etc.

it helps to realize, approaching women you like is like approaching anyone...we just want you to be real.

[bettiepagerules]

Well being someone who doesn't dance except slow dances, meeting people at clubs is not my deal and the fact that I couldn't get into anyway. But even if I could I don't really think it's the greatest idea to hook up with the person I found the most attractive in a club for the first time.

 

I think if you find something you are interested you'll meet someone there.

 

But seriously join clubs, take classes you are interested in, and start doing stuff you like and you'll meet the perfect person for you.

 

And in regards to having courage, remember that girls feel that it's NOT old fashioned for them not to make any moves and wait for the guys. So just go up and say Hi to the new person.