just found out my husband has been having affair

[kookie2004]

i have just joined this site and found out my husband has been having a two year affair, he says he loves this girl but she wants babies(he doesnt)he has been having affairs throughout our marriage evey time i found out he would beg fogivness cry and i suppose say the things i wanted to hear.i took him back time after time and when i asked him why, he would say that i had put on weight and was not attractive,he would critisise me on a daily basis but i still loved him supported him and remained faithfull. when i am with him. i feel fat ugly and worthless,he goes for days without speaking to me but still i carried on trying to smile whilst inside i was crying.

now i find out through his posts that he is thinking of having a baby with this women. we have two beautifull young children (he has 20yr old)i have put all my energy into them and not worried about me.

seeing it written down that he loves her and basically should he stay for the kids and wonder what could have been(NO WAY)i cant seem to stop crying i ask him to talk about it he just got angry. and said he is not talking about it i asked him to leave without a fuss(he never has in the past)

he said he will. i have my doubts as he has said it is his house why should he go.(he has never walked out i have always thrown him out)

where do i go from here i feel so sad. i know now my marriage is finally over.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

where do i go from here i feel so sad. i know now my marriage is finally over.

 

your marriage probably is over, or maybe it should be. imo, where you should go from here is directly to a good lawyer.

[Phoenix69]

Leave. Now. Take the kids, go and rent a house, even if its dump, you can work your way up, the most important thing is you and your babies. Your husband can feck off for himself! He is NOT worthy of your love. Even if he thinks your marrige is not over, MAKE IT SO! Cut your losses with the house and get yourself a good lawyer and take him to the cleaners, sue him for adultery! You deserve much MUCH better than that kind of life for you and your kids. THEY derserve a better father figure than that poor excuse of a man!

[yeawutever]

Yup, it's over for good esp. since he's consider having children ouside the marriage. Consult a lawyer as soon as possible for legal actions and talk about the divorce process.

[BellaDonna]

You do not deserve this kind of treatment. I'm sorry you are going through this.

 

I definitly think you should talk to a lawyer ASAP. You need an action plan. If he refuses to leave, and you end up having to- do you have a friend or family member that could help?

 

My personal opinion is that if he cheated and betrayed you and everyone else in the household- he should be the one leaving the household. If his mistress is so great- he should go stay with her- at least until you can get the house sold or have him buy you out or vice versa.

 

You need to know your rights and responsibilities as someone seeking a divorce where you live. Talking to a lawyer will not make the hurt go away- but it will least give you more control and knowledge, and you can make an action plan to get out of this situation

 

BellaDonna.

[iamteddybearfeelmecuddle]

even if you can't get the house, the car, etc. you're freedom from being saddled with this man is worth soooo much more than any of that could ever be. do get a lawyer, and get out...