Support Groups

[dnl940]

Have any of you ever attended a support group for divorce or breakups? Since my g/f and I have broken up I have been dealing with some very strong emotions, not only about our breakup but also from my divorce. I was wondering if anyone has ever attended any of these support groups and if they were helpful?

[Beyondthesea]

I have not been to support groups for that, but I have been to other support groups for various other issues I was having. I can honestly say it does help a lot! You meet people who are going through similiar problems and feelings. It helps you realize you are not alone through these hard times and that you will be alright

 

Try going a few times, what could it hurt?

[Dako]

I haven't been to a therapist or formal group session. I have gone to depression groups and found them too depressing.

The first help I got was from other guys I knew who'd been through it. Regardless of the rep men have, each divorced mentor was so helpful and caring, I got a good grounding in how to cope with the stages. Nobody was insensitive or flippant, even the chuckleheads who razz me the most were open and respectful.

This forum became an education about each phase that plagued me, and I even felt less lonely as others chimed in. Just yesterday, an unexpected wave of depression nailed me after a month of clear sailing. Just checking in here helped.

 

You can get past it, and there's really no magic cure. It's like getting over a bad illness. I'm doing okay after a a long marriage ended.

[littleone22]

You know what helps me, Im going through a wave of emotions too, is going to church. I don't know if you are religious or not, but I have started to go back to a church that I stopped going to when I dated my ex, and I have a great group of friends, as well as a group I can go to that I can share my thoughts, as well as get my mind of all the negativity my relationship left me with.

The group of people I share things with have really helped me see reality, as well as keep me accountable if I felt myself getting down. Even if you aren't religious, or dont attend a church, there are many churches where you can simply join a recovery group for divorce, and they meet weekly. It may help you.

You will be ok, just keep accountable to someone, and they will help you in your weak moments.

[dnl940]

I went to church for the first time in probably 15 years this past weekend. But the problem I'm having is that I really don't have a very extensive group of friends right now due to moving etc. So I'm looking for something. I found this forum a couple of months ago and it has helped, but I'm looking for more. All of these emotions right now are so powerful and overwhelming. I don't think that I ever really grieved about my marriage ending because within about a month I was in the relationship with the now ex g/f. Now I feel like I'm experiencing the pain from both relationships ending at the same time. So I'm just wanting to know if others have gone to these groups and if they've been good experiences or not?

[NubianLove]

Do you think that maybe you werent ready for this relationship when it happened, and u jumped right into it for comfort, and it was really a rebound situation. This like u said is probably your reason for grieving right now so strongly, you never had anytime for yourself, which is very important. It was easy to avoid the situation by finding someone else and trying to move on quickly but that wasnt the best as you've seen.

I'd suggest a therapist/relationship counselor, though they can be quite expensive(anywhere from $50-$100/hr), maybe an hr session 1x-2x a month will do you a lot of good.