Little Help

[inspiration]

Well I had a second date with someone but she called it off. Not a big surprise and I don't regret anything I did.

 

But then I know of this other woman who I really do not know all that well. I sit down by her in the library @ school. She asks where I've been and I ask her the same question because she never comes to class. We discuss how we are both doing and really nonsense chit chat.

 

But ever since I met her she wants me to go play a sport w/ her... I have her number but I never call. We are still sitting there then I state I'm getting a haircut... that's when she starts running her fingers through my hair... Okay this is pretty awkward but I didn't really mind it. But it bothers me that she can be so pushy with me and have a boyfriend. I just don't understand. Should I call her to just hang out? (never see her in person) I don't want anyone to get hurt but i'm stuck with the "what if there is something there" thoughts again.

 

input would be appreciated. take care

[Bethany]

Should I call her to just hang out?

 

Absolutely not! She has a BF. Don't get involved.

[Dating Coach]

Absolutely not! She has a BF. Don't get involved.

 

Agreed. Will you listen? We'll see...

[inspiration]

i'll listen. but what if i just go to go... with no goals of anything other than a friendship.

[Dating Coach]

Yeah, that'll work. When guys do this they hang on to hopes anyway and it is completely pointless. If you are saying you will move in as "friends" you're lying to youself and us. It's best just to move on. Tell her that you don't mess around with girls who aren't available, but if she dumps the guy, she can call you. Will you be available? Maybe or maybe not.

[inspiration]

Well I don't know what to say. I'm not going to call her... since I haven't yet. But I'm just slightly lost on this whole friends situation. It seems as though one cannot want to be friends w/ the opposite sex. Don't know and don't care to know why not. Would it be wrong for any guy to go play w/ her? it seems as though talking is okay but then if you two spend any time together that's prohibited which I find complete bs... but what do i know anyways?

[Dating Coach]

If you have feelings for her, then hanging out as friends is a bad idea because it won't make it easier to take the right path-which is to move on. Instead, you will become closer and keep hanging on to hopes. That's about the worst thing you could do. Move on. Leave her as an "aquaintance" and nothing more.

[MrMilk]

Hey dude

 

I've been in your situation, it sucks.

 

But let's be honest here, you're not hoping to become friends; you want more. And so your continuing to hang around her will only end up with you wasting your time and energy, and getting hurt. She is taken.

 

Repeat, she is taken.

 

And, yes, guys and girls can be friends. But if one likes the other, it gets messy.

 

Sorry to be so blunt, but when I've been in your situation it's taken a really blunt statement to knock me out of my futile hopes.

[inspiration]

didn't call her. doesn't matter now. being blunt is good. nothing really matters now. i've heard some of the dumbest things over the past 24 hours and i just don't care about alot of people who i had respect for before. i don't know what happened to people's ability to think things out rationally but it's obviously been lost.