32 days - I broke NC

[Rob1000]

Well I did it. I broke NC. I basically wanted to open the door to some future communication without being needy or submissive. What do you guys think?

 

At 0730 this morning, I sent her the (slightly altered) cute text message I used to send everyday when we were together. The text conversation went something like this...

 

ME: Any 'kinda' cute girls on the bus this morning?

HER: Just the one as usual!!

ME: Well can you pass the phone to her?!!

HER: Cheeky!!

 

.. and I left it at that. This way I have let her know that I'm not mad at her, am not bitter and the lines are open if she ever wants to talk. Finally for myself, I know now that I have done all I can. Now I have to move on. I have no regrets and even feel a kind of relief. I will under no circumstances be contacting her again. There is nothing left hanging over me. Plus the fact that I left her hanging a little and have probably confused her a little makes me feel kinda good!!

 

Onwards and upwards people!! So what d'you guys think?

[lillady898]

It made you feel better and it wasn't destructive (to self or otherwise). It can't be too bad, eh?

 

In other situations it might be different. Just be sure there wasn't some ulterior motive to contacting her.

[Orlander]

That's pretty funny Rob. It's only a good move though if you have moved on and are honest with yourself about what the contact truly meant. I can't help but believe that if you were truly over her you wouldnt get satisfaction out of the fact you might have left her a little confused.

 

Remember, if the lines of communication are open between the two of you and you are not over her, you will get hurt. I guarantee it. Good luck!

[NubianLove]

I think thats cool and all but I think maybe a lil bit more could be said. Maybe its just me.

[Rob1000]

The only reason I did was to let her know that she could contact me if she wanted. I am in no way over her.

 

Maybe I could have said a little more but from her responses I didn't feel like she was too bothered! I wanted to make it light hearted and un-needy and I think I did.

 

Any further opinion is welcome.

[Rob1000]

I think thats cool and all but I think maybe a lil bit more could be said. Maybe its just me.

Hey Nubian.. do you think I should say something else at a later stage?

[lillady898]

I think the fact that you're still counting the days of no contact is proof enough you're not over her. We tend to stop counting after we're over them.

 

I, honestly, wouldn't say anything else. You opened the door, she can choose whether or not to walk through. It doesn't matter how vague your words were. If she's curious, she'll ask you what's up.

 

Maybe wait until you are over her until the next time you say something. Maybe then, you won't even care to say anyting, but if you do, you'll be sure to not have any high hopes that will likely be broken.

[Spawn]

well, if you wanna keep some contact....keep it simple. Don't think whether you shud have said more or you shud say this or that or something you missed out on sayin last time you talked.

 

Just keep emotions out of it.....

[Rob1000]

Thanks guys.

 

I think the simple fact is this. She broke up with me. If she wanted to be with me, I have let her know by my light hearted text message that I am by no means un-approachable.

[Bethany]

Thanks guys.

 

I think the simple fact is this. She broke up with me. If she wanted to be with me, I have let her know by my light hearted text message that I am by no means un-approachable.

 

Then you did the right thing.

[Lita43]

Hey Rob,

Just take it from somebody that know's (with age comes wisdom.)

Nobody worth a crap would play games and it's your heart on the line and I say being straight up and honest is the best way to go!

Say everything like it is and if you get shot down, then she is not the right one for you and relationships don't need to be that difficult.

Open communication is the ultimate, so alway's say it like it is!

Being on my second marriage, I know what I'm saying is true and trust is a must!!!

Wear your heart on your sleeve, cuz nobody likes secerets and you will always know if somebody accepts you for you the way you are and then you won't have to make many concessions for anyone.

Who doesn't want to feel free in life???

The one that will take you for your "TRUE SELF" is the one that you're meant to be with! It's just that simple!!!

People make things more complicated than need be.

You have common interests or you don't, you have same values or you don't, you like the same T.V. shows or movies (well maybe not all), but that's ok.

You like concerts, privacy times, being with friends, kids, family etc.

If you can't be on the same page with important issues in life, then it's probably not wise to persue.

Even though most people revolve life around looks or **X, this is not the big picture, so think about it!

 

Lita~ P.S. Good Luck!

[Rob1000]

Thanks Lita. Should I do anything or just walk away? I love her with all my heart and this is just me clinging on in the only way it knows best.

[Belgian girl]

Also good luck! (Sure she still has the same number ?)

[NubianLove]

Rob at the end of the day, you know her better than us, would she be one normally to say more? some people just arent that way.