3rd week of NC, Need Encouragement

[capricorn85]

Hello everyone! Well I am serious about my NC now. I am going on the 3rd week of not speaking to my ex. I saw him three weeks ago and it was hard afterwards. I cried and got depressed again so I realized I need to take a stand and move on from him. For six months he has been playing with my emotions. I know I can find someone better, but I feel like a lot of the people coming my way aren't any good. I want to be able to find that special someone. Why hasn't my ex called me? I know I am the best thing that happened to him (or maybe I'm not?), but I do know that no other woman will treat him the way I did. Sorry guys needed to VENT. But seriously does he not care at all?

[Belgian girl]

Hi

I don't know what I expect about what's going to happen in your case, also because I don't know so much about the situation..

Maybe some encouragement I could give you by trying to realize it could take more time than three weeks for him to start missing you (probably now he's searching other things to do, other people to go on with,..)

Well, I guess the best for you to help you through the NC is to do about the same. (I think it's up to you if you let it 'show' that you are still going on with your life again (I think that's usually the best also for him if he finds out that you really are..)) So maybe the best advice I could give: take a chance to do the things you have more time for now.

All the best,

Susan

[Belgian girl]

Could you please explain what VENT means? I'm new here and I don't know.. Thanks!

[Diggitydave]

I am in the same predicament as you just so you know. How did you finally take the stand?

[bobo85]

vent: just to talk to get your feelings out

[bobo85]

I'm sure he cares about you as a person since you two have been together as an intimate couple. But sometimes people's feelings change and there is nothing we can do about it. I remember hearing this quote..."We are not the same persons this year as last; nor are those we love. It is a happy chance if we, changing, continue to love a changed person." - W. Somerset Maugham

 

EVERYONE changes and we have to deal with it. Remember that NC is not a way to get your ex back...its to fully heal all your wounds....because with time and no contact...you can fully recover from the pain your body just suffered and you can begin moving on with your life.

[capricorn85]

DiggityDave, Ihave been dealing with these issues for six months. When I saw him three weeks ago I like crap afterwards! I had to take a stand for my own sanity. I know that during this NC period I need to work on me as a person. I am not doing too bad, but the thought that he might never realize what he lost kind of bothers me.

 

One of my exes of 2.5 years is now back trying sooo hard to be with me, but I have no feelings left for him, maybe thats why I can't help but wonder if my most recent ex will do the same.

[NJRon]

I have been just over a week of NC now, and it feel so good after 6 months of LC. You're doing great! 3 whole weeks! I have the same feeling though as you do.... secretly wondering when, or if, she will ever realize what she threw away. I guess that's just a sort of satisfaction thing... something to validate my value as a person and, in the end, I don't need that sort of validation from someone who discarded me.

 

Hang in there

[Spawn]

Capri i am in my fourth week.

 

In the first week when i decided about stopping all contact, it was very hard on me. Think it this way, if you contact your ex they will think we are so weak we can't even live without them, not to mention its a boost to their ego as well. The more you stay in control of your life, the longer you stay away from them, it will make your ex wonder whats happenning, stronger you appear in their eyes.

 

You are proving that you have a life without your ex, so live the pain and keep going.

 

Somebody truly said here that we are just guilty of lovin someone who just couldn't love us back.

 

take care....