PrettyKitty Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 im am paranoid! i am always scared that my boyfriend will cheat on my when he goes out with the boys (every friday is boys night). i end up staying awake half the night because im worried. he tells me he'll never do it but he's cheated on me before (2 years ago). i know he loves me but im still scared. what should i do? this is killing me... please, give me any advice you can Link to comment
hearmeoutPLZ Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 well,, they say that when he do it once, he'll prolly do it twice but if he really loves you.. theres a 80% chance that he wont but since u took him back, you have a role to fulfill too and that is to give him the trust he deserves... Link to comment
hoping Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 all i know is that a relationship will NOT work if there isn't any trust between BOTH partners......i believe u should express ur concern to him...but sounds like u already have....i honestly think u 2 should spend some QUALITY time together for a bit.....and see how things go from there....if he loves u....he should be concern about the fact that ur unhappy about him going out all the time.... Link to comment
PrettyKitty Posted April 4, 2006 Author Share Posted April 4, 2006 thanks you guys for your replies, i appreciate it Link to comment
catgirl82 Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 i am sure that you are just feeling paranoid because this has happened in the past. i dont have much experience with cheating on either end, but i think you need to really settle this issue with yourself. if you dont trust your boyfriend, then youre always going to feel this way. you need to be honest with yourself and with him and really work on establishing that trust. if this happened 2 years ago, and you are still paranoid, it seems you never really got that trust back Link to comment
fishrrshortae Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 2 years ago and you're still paranoid?! Honey I'm not saying this is a problem with YOU per se, or even a problem with him.. but for 2 years he has been going out on Friday nights, and you have been paranoid this whole time and haven't dealt with it? If you are ready to trust him again, by all means stay in the relationship. If you are unable to trust him, what's the point of being with him? Feeling safe and secure with him? Apparently not.. Comfortable? No, not on Friday nights.. Really think about this... Link to comment
sonjam Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 I agree, if I had to be in a relationship where my gf didn't trust me, I would think "what the heck, she thinks i'm doing it anyway, so why not?" By putting trust in someon, it assures them of your loyalty and devotion. If you show trust, he would be less inclined to stray...it's simple really. But then - trust or no trust, if he is the kind of person that would cheat, he's gonna do it anyway, doesn't matter if you follow him around, or not. Link to comment
NW Homey Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Is this something you have delt with in past relationships or is * * * something new because he cheated on you? If it something you go through in all (or most) of your relationships you might look into things like codependancy and love addiction for starters. It is possible that you may find yourself in these kinds of relationships due to these issues. Check it out. If it is only because of this insedent with him cheating the one time, I agree that you toook him back, you should try to trust him. Since you are haveing problems with that I would talk to him about that. He should be willing to do whatever it takes for you to be comfortable until he has earned your trust again. If he isn't willing to work with you in doing whatever it takes for you to be comfortable then I would seriously question whether he is really that interested in you. Link to comment
AntiLove_SuperStar Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 Well Id say if he did it before, he could have done it since, and he may do it again. The thing is..can you learn to trust him? If not, you know what you have to do.... Link to comment
yeawutever Posted April 4, 2006 Share Posted April 4, 2006 If you're paronoid you might as well break up. Since he has done it two years ago, there is no guaranteed that he will not do it again. Why drive yourself crazy with those thoughts? Wouldn't you wanna be with someone you don't have to be paranoid about nor constantly thinking "Oh where is he" Is he going with someon else", I mean that would drive me nuts, that's why I would break up right away. Link to comment
Recommended Posts
Create an account or sign in to comment
You need to be a member in order to leave a comment
Create an account
Sign up for a new account in our community. It's easy!
Register a new accountSign in
Already have an account? Sign in here.
Sign In Now