Giving it a go...

[Consumed]

Well, I've signed up on a site and posted a profile with pic. Saw a girl I liked straight away, messaged her jokingly saying she was in the wrong place (she is very attractive) and asked if she fancied a coffee (again, jokingly). She replied pretty promptly asking what it is I do, to which I replied earlier today (masters student)

 

However, I have had no reply since she read it this morning (the site tells you if your messages have been read). I'm abit taken aback due to the promptness of her first reply (she saw my profile picture immedietely so I hope I passed that test!), generally thinking she'd reply straight away to this one.

 

I guess what I'm asking is "is this what it's like"? Do new people like myself generally get their hopes up too early? Amazingly within 5 mins of signing up on this site I found her (I'm EXTREMELY sceptical about such things, also I feel their is still a strong stigma attached to them however I thought 'why not, a bit of fun'). I'm quite picky when it comes to girls (I see no shallowness in saying I must find them attractive) and unfortunately apart from her there are no others (though some sound interesting and intelligent they havn't posted photos).

 

So I guess, having spammed these boards with drivel and no real questions, all i'm asking is "Is it a long and winding road"

 

Thanks peeps

[annie24]

Well, you're just meeting her for coffee, it's no big deal.

 

I think EVERYONE these days is online. I am, and it's been funny how many of my coworkers and classmates I've been matched up with!!!

 

Just go, it's just coffee, see what happens. If there's not interest, no big deal.

 

good luck!

[Scout]

Let me ask you something...did you message her mostly because you thought she was good looking? Because if so, you're going to really have to narrow down your search. The really good looking folks get tons of messages, so unless you have some strong things in common with them and make note of that in your initial inquiries, you might have some trouble getting an actual date.

[Consumed]

Hi, thanks for the replies. Of course, the photo caught my initial interest, however I read her profile and she sounds equally intelligent and interesting, certainly someone I'd like to get to know. Perhaps I just approached it wrong, as I said i'm new to it all however I thought complimenting her physical appearance to be a good start, yet I also mentioned she sounded intelligent and good fun (did I go wrong somewhere)?

[friscodj]

Hey Consumed-

 

Let me tell you something. I have been dating online for a while now and have met several women online. Women get a lot of email dude! A lot. If she's pretty, expect she's receiving 100+ emails a day easily from guys (if it's a popular site). Seriously. A few women I knew who had active profiles up created email accounts just for their profile and were so overwhelmed within a few weeks that they had to take their profile down. They just couldn't keep up...

 

My advice is not to get your hopes up about anyone right away. Realize also people are busy and may not reply to you for a couple of days. This doesn't mean they aren't interested, it's just real life bro...

 

And she probably reads compliments about her physical appearance day-in and day-out. What you ought to do is read her profile carefully, and focus your first message on something that really stands out to you besides her looks and something you have in common. I've found that to work the best. Remember your message has to stand out, so the subject line is very important. Try to convey that commonality in there...

 

Then you want to ask for a casual meeting within a week or so after a couple of exchanged emails...

[Scout]

No, those are all nice things to say. Not sure if I would suggest a date in the first email; you want to have a few emails going back and forth so you can more accurately judge if there's enough rapport and common interests to actually meet in person.

[Scout]

What you ought to do is read her profile carefully, and focus your first message on something that really stands out to you besides her looks and something you have in common. I've found that to work the best. Remember your message has to stand out, so the subject line is very important. Try to convey that commonality in there...

 

Then you want to ask for a casual meeting within a week or so after a couple of exchanged emails...

 

Ditto that.

[Consumed]

Thanks for the advice all, a shame I didn't come talk to you guys yesterday, could have made a great start with this girl! I suspect I've blown this one. Oh well, keep the chin up, shall take all this on board and GO GET 'EM.

 

Thanks