Should I call him?

[tynabluez09]

I have had only one major relationship in my life. He was perfect. I was 18 and he was 23... quite the age difference i know, my father thought so too. But after meeting him for the first time, my parents immediately fell in love with him, as did I. And he took time with me. It took him 3 months to kiss me and after that, well, things took off. I hadnt had any luck with guys in high school and, i actually had given up when I met him. I also had given up on people correctly interpreting my poetry. But he could, and not only that, he could respond. Thats who our relationship began. We never fought or had a disagreement in the 5 months we were together. Well, in the same area I mean. Things got rocky when i went away for college... surprise, surprise I know. He wanted to let things end, but i couldnt. I was in love, and i knew, he was all i wanted. And, he was... i developed a slight crush on friend, but i was totally devoted to him.

 

However, he had is own issues. Issues he apparently didnt want to share with me. He had displayed good behavior all the way from late aug till the beginning of october. then, he dissappeared for a month... I still dont know what exactly happened. He didnt return my emails or few phone calls, i was sooooooooooooooo crushed... wrote really good poetry though. Then out of the blue, he calls me around the time of thanksgiving. Saying he was going threw crap and he wanted to do it alone. I think he wanted to see me during thanksgiving but i didnt visit him then or during christmas break. I was angry, but my anger subsided, and in late Jan, around my birthday, i called him again and we started talking as if nothing happened. He sent me roses on V-day and we spent all of my spring break together.... then, on the last day of spring break... things went down the crapper again. The last day was Easter, which also was our one year anniversary (despite the fact that we were "separated" for a bit.) He pretty much stood me up till the end of the day cuz he had to spend time with his family... which, is fine. i just wish he called. but he said he left his phone at home. well, i dont need to go to far into this...that night, he didnt kiss me goodbye but he did cuddle with me during the movie before... and, resorted back to not calling. which confused me sooooo much. nothing happened, nothing went wrong. i left him alone, but called like at the end of my semester cuz i failed a class and was upset... he called me back within the next hour... and when i went home, i talked to him and he said, i will give you a call tomorrow.... never did. thats how it ended.

 

I havent had any good relationships since him (its been like a year... we stopped talking in early summer 2002)... partly because, i still love him and miss him... he was my best friend more then a boyfriend. he understood me more then anyone and i still need his advice and damn it, i just miss talking to him... and after the last relationship was with an unexperience virgin who actually asked for sex then, sexually harrased me till i dumped his ass. And, i really needed someone to talk to... and duh, i wanted to call him... just for his guidedance... and, so i did. i didnt say anything to him or leave a message, but im desperate to call again. but i dont know... will he be really mad... what if he like hated me for some reason?

[Goldie]

Because it just didn't work out did it! I know you don't want me to say this because what you want to hear is 'call him and everything will be okay'.

 

But it won't be okay. Because if it was meant to be then he'd have contacted you. Ages ago. But he hasn't. So you're going to have to face facts and move on.

 

It must be heartbreaking I know. I'm going through a similar dilemma at the moment but with a boyfriend who is thinking of ending our relationship and I don't know whether to leave him alone or call him!

 

It's hard but you must be brave and strong like me and just let things be. Sometimes the past is best left in the past. And you should really be looking at the 'now' and concentrating on making yourself happy.

 

I know it sounds cliche, but you'll be laughing at all this in a couple of months time. There are so many nice people out there so get out there and smile. You'll be surprised the people you meet and how much they want to know you.

 

Give yourself a break. Finding someone to have a relationship with is hard. Look at all the millions of lonely people out there. You'll find someone but in the meantime just chill out and enjoy your own company.

 

Goldie sends love and kisses... xxx

[69HondaRaceGirl23]

Hello, honey, I know it hurts...believe me I know. I just went through the same thing, a little different circumstances. It is the sound of their voice you miss. You miss the routine...You are so used to talking to him, that when you don't, you feel like something is missing. I assure you. Its normal. And that something is missing, your man. But, Its not him. Its you. I know that sounds bad, but just think about it. You are you, you have the will power to change the way you feel. Don't let something like this ruin YOU. If you want to, you can feel better. I know it is easier said then done. But that is what somebody told me when me and my guy broke up, and it comforted me for awhile. Like now it is 4 AM, i cannot sleep for fear i will try and call him. Just do other things that don't make you think of him, and eventually that will become your new routine and he wont cross your mind, but every now and then.