the "shy guy"

[horty232]

Im a senior in high school right now and i am one of those quiet type who really only talk if im talked to. I never try to go up to anyboyd new and try to talk to them... and i want to know how to get out of this phase in my life. I've always been kind of quiet and shy in my life....but never to this extreme. I just think everybody is judging me constantly on how i look or anyting i say or do. I guess this all came as a result of a really bad reputation i got because i all i did in my younger years was smoke pot get wasted and thats just not who i am ne more... but thats how i feel everyone percieves me and it makes really really anxious when i start talking to new people because i feel like thats how im percieved. I dont know... i just need some advice on how to open up more and let people see the real me...not the anxious and nervous person who i am right now

[eljose]

I was very shy in high school and two things helped me get over that. First, I read a lot of books on shyness and social skills. I used that quiet time I had around others to observe what was going on socially in class. I learned a lot from that.

 

The other thing I did was I graduated and went off to college. In a new environment, where no one knew me or had any expectations of what I should be like, I was able to come out of my shell very quickly.

 

Shy is the last thing people think of me now and it is definitely more entertaining that way.

[robowarrior]

I even had a 'vision' where i saw my uncle saying to me 'if you don't want to be alone you have to step towards people.

 

thereforeeee if you want to socialize, then you need to start talking to people.

 

Action gives reaction.

 

So that means that you HAVE to take 'initiative' to talk to people. Things are accomplished by making sacrifices. You have to make a sacrifice in forms of 'making an effort' into talking if you want people to talk back. If you do nothing, then nothing is what you harvest.

[altosinger314]

In my freshman year of high school, I was kind of shy, just stayed inside my group. But in the summer before sophomore year started, I went on vacation and my life just changed completely. Strike up conversations, people usually like talking.

 

Don't worry about the pot thing, I'm actually surprised. Everyone on my college campus smokes pot or something else. Not that I'm encouraging it, but in college no one will know or care about what you were like in high school.

[Andy223]

i just need some advice on how to open up more and let people see the real me...not the anxious and nervous person who i am right now

 

I'm sure your a great person, u just need to show everyone that. To do this you need more confidence... thats all. Without it, you will be too scared to act, or your actions will not work.

 

If only I ______ then i would be more confident... The interesting thing about most peoples attitude towards confidence is that, they think that in order to have confidence they have to have success in the area that they seak it. This is not true.

 

Confidence comes through belief, it isnt the result of something. In other words, confidence comes first. Then after you have confidence, u can expect all the good results that come from it. Confidence snowballs, but you need a leap of faith to get the ball rowling

 

All you need to do is have faith in your actions... If there is a girl you like and would normally avoid... instead go up to her and say hi, ignoring her didnt get you anywhere before did it?

[horty232]

well thx i really appreciate all the things you guys said... i guess your right the only way im going to change this is well first of all yeah i do need more confidence in myself and i need to be the one who strikes up the conversations... im also going to college next year so hopefully i will be able to have a fresh start...and your right robowarrior i have been doing nothing and thats pretty much my biggest problem... well thanx for putting everything into perspective for me and i will try my best to get out there and start talking to more people...something i should have been doing a long time ago